On this day many years ago (we do NOT need to say just how many), you made a difficult decision. It was the right one for both of us.
Thank you for facilitating my exit from your life then inviting me back in this year.
It was a long time coming, right? I felt weird about searching for you while my adoptive parents were still alive, but I thought about you regularly. I often wondered if I ever passed you on the street.
Thanks to Ancestry.com, I connected with Cousin Laura, and she led me to you.
It may have taken a while, but once we finally talked, it was great — easy conversation from that first call.
And when I finally met you over Memorial Day weekend? Well. Let’s just say that so many things finally made sense. Dislike of raw onions? Love of cooking? Obsession with rocks and shells?
The apple didn’t fall far from the tree. In fact, it’s practically still on the tree.
Meeting my half siblings Kara and Lodell was so cool and illuminating. We were quoting movies within the first 10 minutes. Same sense of humor.
It felt like a missing puzzle piece clicked into place.
And that night playing Taboo with you, them and some of their kids? I looked around and realized that, for the first time in my life, I was blood related to everyone there.
That was a big moment.
When we got everyone together for Labor Day, it was overwhelming in a good way. Aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews — all with the same open nature, genuine warmth and dry sense of humor.
And the boys love having “New Grandma.” Gideon told his friend the other day about this exchange:
You, telling me about the hotel room you booked for us: I took care of the first night.
Me, in a joking way: I said no!
You: But I said yes, and I’m your mother.
They thought that was great. I did too.
I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you this year. It’s one of the few good things that happened in 2020. My heart is full.
And I look forward to spending more time with you when the world gets back to normal.
Happy holidays. And thank you for making a difficult decision. It was the best birthday gift: my birth.
My mother said she prayed to you that I would have a child just like me. I recognized that as a threat by an aggravated woman.
You delivered.
But I think you went too far.
I had common sense, at least.
Dominic does not have common sense.
Here’s why I know this to be true:
1. The exchange below. Context: I set up a new Google Voice number for students in my class to use. I asked the family to test it.
2. The fact that he came into my bedroom at 9:30 Thursday night holding a package of turkey bacon without the packaging. That’s right: 10 or so strips of bacon in his bare hands.
Him: I opened the refrigerator, and this fell out onto the floor.
Me, stunned: Well, don’t bring it naked and dripping INTO MY BEDROOM!
I wish I had taken a photo. I was too revolted at him turkey touching everything to think about that.
He does make up for it by making me laugh with things like this:
And remember our Rock City visit? This is how he ruined an artsy shot I was trying to take:
Yes, that’s his shoe. 🙄
This kid.
So thanks, I guess, for giving me Dominic in all his glory.
I will not be surprised AT ALL when you get the ‘Rona. You took no precautions. I was, quite frankly, horrified.
Yes, we visited too, but we took ample precautions:
We stayed in our four-person bubble.
We stayed at a reputable hotel.
We wore masks everywhere but the hotel room and the car.
We washed our hands and sanitized ourselves regularly.
You, however, did NOT do all of those things.
Example 1: Dinner Friday night
After we went to see a movie (yes, in a theater for the first time since February*), we went to Big River Grille for our reservation. We ran a gauntlet featuring about 15 unmasked people around the door.
Then the hostess tried to sit us in a booth next to another group. My back would have been six inches from some stranger’s back.
NO, THANK YOU.
See Rock City’s sanitizing stations.
Example 2: Ruby Falls on Sunday
There were about a thousand signs saying Ruby Falls is a TOUCH-FREE CAVE. Not only is it bad for the stalagmites and stalactites (oils from human hands keep the formations from growing) but CORONAVIRUS, HELLO!
Our very-loud guide must have said “no touching” 437 times. Every single time, a guy in the group in front of us could not help himself. He touched EVERYTHING.
Though this year has sucked in ways large and small, I’m thankful for all of you. I have big emotions regarding a few of you, but I’ll save that for a later post.
On this day of Thanksgiving (glossing over the actual horrific origins of this celebration), I’m thankful for small things (in no particular order):
I get it: You aren’t a fan of online learning. As I told one of your teachers this week: You are not thriving in the remote environment (to put it mildly).
But you do actually have to do the work until there is an alternative.
Part of your problem is your lack of time-management skills and your habit of prioritizing things like watching “The Mandalorian” over getting your work done.
Do you really want to repeat 10th grade? You’d end up going to school with your brother.
I KNOW you don’t want that. So pull yourself together.
Congratulations! You and our inept president have helped the United States reach a milestone.
(Ironic how your battle cry is the co-opted “My body, my choice.”)
I understand your desire for personal freedom. But with personal freedom comes personal responsibility. But often, though, people do not do the right thing for themselves or others.
Let’s look at some past freedom vs. personal/public safety issues:
Motorcycle helmets. Despite the fact that many people wanted to be more likely to die in a motorcycle crash did not want a helmet law, Georgia makes it mandatory to wear a helmet. (Incidentally, Georgia had the first helmet law in the United States.)
Seatbelt laws. Despite the fact that many people wanted to be more likely to die in a car crash did not want a seatbelt law, Georgia (and 48 other states) makes it mandatory to wear seatbelts.
Speed limits. Despite the fact that many people wanted to be more likely to die in a high-speed crash did not want speed limits, the federal government and state governments passed speed limit laws.
Those four legislative efforts save roughly 723,000 lives every year.* The first three save nearly 30,000. That’s a large enough number to warrant legislation, apparently.
Clearly, we are not managing the spread effectively.
Clearly, lives are at stake.
Clearly, we need to do something.
I’m not a huge fan of personally intrusive legislation like a national mask mandate, but if y’all keep up your shenanigans, that is EXACTLY what we are going to need.
So wear a damn mask, and stay away from people not in your household.
Kthxbye,
Beth
*I’m happy to give you my sources for those stats, but I know you don’t trust scientific or news sources. (In case you do, and I’m being unfair, visit the links in the post plus this one and this one and this one.)
Thank you for teaching me how to play Among Us. It’s not often I can hang out with a herd of 14- and 15-year-old boys (or want to, really).
Side note: What would a group of hormonal boys be called? A Testosterone of Teens? A Breakout of Boys? A (Growth) Spurt of Sons?
I can’t believe y’all were willing to have me in a game AND allow me in your Discord chat. I’m a mom; it’s not cool to be seen with me, I thought.
You were very welcoming and polite.
I’m sure it took some restraint to keep the convo clean, Gideon’s handle excluded. (Gideon, why?)
I realize I didn’t contribute much to the discussion. I was more interested in completing tasks than keeping my eye on character movements.
That one time I was the imposter was illuminating. I knew immediately I had given myself away when I popped in and out of a vent. It was an accident: I didn’t know what I was doing.
Gideon to me later: I can’t believe you killed me. Me: I didn’t kill you. That was Roscoe. Gideon: No! You killed me! Me: Are you sure? Dominic: You’re so ruthless that you don’t even remember the people you’ve killed.
Really, it was more ineptitude than ruthlessness.
Anyway, I know I’ll get better with practice. I hope you’ll let me play again.
With loads of appreciation,
Gideon and Dominic’s Mom
I couldn’t believe that people would vote for Trump the first time. But they did, and he won. And we all got on with it.
We’ve had four years of (fill in your preferred adjective).
Why is it so hard to believe that the same sentiment that drove the “silent majority” to the polls against Clinton in 2016 could be the same thing driving folks against Trump in 2020?
The election was not rigged. There hasn’t been widespread voter fraud.
Let’s look at the ways Americans had to vote:
Early voting. This does not seem to be in dispute.
In-person voting Nov. 3. This does not seem to be in dispute.
Absentee voting. This is apparently what’s in dispute. By Trump.
With absentee voting, people could mail them in or drop them in a ballot box. State laws vary, but the mailed-in ballots usually are counted as long as they are postmarked by Nov. 3. The deadline to drop in the ballot box in Georgia was 7 p.m. on Nov. 3. Again, states vary.
OK, stay with me here: Early voting and in-person voting are tabulated easily. Absentee voting takes longer because poll workers have to open and carefully check the ballots in a guard against — wait for it — fraud. Some states can open and count early. Some can’t.
I am a Georgia voter. I did not want to wait in line and be around people in a PANDEMIC. I requested, filled out and returned an absentee ballot via drop box by the Nov. 3 deadline.
Also, Trump himself has used absentee voting (as recently as August) and encouraged people to vote by mail. In Arizona. Where he thought he had plenty of support.
Just as the Democrats have not engineered a worldwide Coronavirus hoax, they have not perpetrated voter fraud. Please note that Georgia and Arizona (two states you are wound up about) both have Republican governors. And Georgia’s Secretary of State is a Republican too. One Trump supported.
Nevada’s is too. Are you alleging that they are in on this plot? Please.
And if Democrats were going to rig an election, wouldn’t they flip the Senate too? Come ON.
So stand down, outraged Trump fans. This is our democracy — the one you profess to love.
This is our process and it works, whether you like it or not.
I won’t be voting that day. Eddie and I chose the absentee route for two reasons:
I believe scientists that the Coronavirus is real and not a hoax perpetrated by the Democratic Party. (I mean, REALLY? A U.S. party is going to get the whole world in on a hoax? To what end?)
Hence, I want to limit potential exposure by not putting myself in close contact with people I don’t know.
I’ve had in-depth conversations with two long-time friends who support you. One was a rational, calm conversation where we agreed more than we disagreed. One was … not like that at all.
Here’s my response to some slogans you and your supporters use.
“Make America Great Again”
I thought America was pretty great pre-2016.
“Keep America Great”
Sorry, but America is not great at the moment. I am NOT better off than I was four years ago. I’m middle class and paying WAY more taxes. The industry in which I work has been negatively affected by your xenophobic policies. And as someone who travels, I can tell you that America is an international embarrassment.
“Life begins at conception”
Fantastic! So that means you’ll protect women endangered by a pregnancy, the children after they are born, old people who might get COVID-19, poor people, immigrants and people on death row. Right? Pro-life means that you support all lives.
“My body, my choice”
This one makes my head explode as it has been co-opted for the anti-mask movement. If you want personal autonomy, great. I’m all for that. But you can’t pick and choose. (See above.)
It should come as no surprise that I will not be voting for you. This is not to say I haven’t voted Republican in the past, and wouldn’t do so again if he/she were the right person.
But you are not the right person.
And the Republican Party is not the Republican Party of old. You know, the one that wanted a smaller government, fiscal responsibility, personal autonomy, etc.
I care about LBGTQIA rights, universal healthcare, eradicating systemic racism, reducing the deficit, upholding personal choice, maintaining separation of church and state — all those things that you are against.
I’m sure it took some restraint to keep the convo clean, Gideon’s handle excluded. (Gideon, why?)
But you know what? 
Observe and report 