Posted in Random, tagged Bright ideas, France, Travel on November 14, 2011| 1 Comment »
As my adventure in Lacoste comes to a close, I’ve been thinking about the future. I see this experience as a pathway to new ones — ones to be revealed later.
It’s probably why I’ve been obsessed with making photos of windows, doors and paths.
Here are some (potentially) postcard-worthy photos (finally).
Posted in Random, tagged Bright ideas, France, Kids, Loneliness, Parenting, Students on October 29, 2011| 4 Comments »
Last year, Eddie and I made a big production out of Halloween. Three families got together to form the cast of the “Wizard of Oz.”
This year, I am sans family. Instead of being part of a big themed costume event, I wore brown, stuck a stick in the buttonhole of my sweater, and called myself a — wait for it — Stick in the Mud.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t have the Halloween spirit or participate in a celebration.
The college I work for introduced the American concept of Halloween to the small medieval village in the South of France where the study-abroad program is located. If today’s turnout is any indication, the French folks in this area have really embraced the tradition. I think every French family within a 30 km radius came to celebrate with us.
Here’s a slideshow of photos from the event:
It may not have been my usual Halloween, but it was unusually fun!
(And maybe now I can forgive the students for making me watch “Hocus Pocus” last night!)
Posted in Random, tagged Food, France, Peeves, Pets, Signs on October 23, 2011| 3 Comments »
After posting my last update, I (not surprisingly) fell into a funk. All I wanted to do was read trashy fiction (Patricia Cornwell, I’m talking about you) and watch “Modern Family.”
Now I’m back.
Here are my top 10 observations about France:
1. French folks haven’t gotten the memo about cigarettes and cancer. Or, if they have, they don’t give a bleu, blanc, rouge crap. Even the mannequins smoke. (It gives new meaning to the sentence, “Check out his butt!”)
2. The French revere their produce in a way that Americans don’t. Even heirloom tomatoes, not conventionally pretty, earn places of distinction at weekly markets.
3. The French pay attention to details. Sure, people flock to the Eiffel Tower, but even a lowly door knocker can be a must-see. And then there is the variety and presentation of delightful treasures such as macarons.
4. Americans appreciate personal space. The French don’t. At all. They end up wearing each other like cheap suits. They don’t even give the Mona Lisa any room.
5. Sometimes the French don’t have a good grasp of English. At least they try. (And more French speak English in France than Americans speak French in America.)
6. Though images can often cross language barriers, sometimes they don’t. And some signs end up being unintentionally hilarious and/or weird. What do these signs mean?
It's OK to cross here with your large piece of lumber?
No coughing while wearing a Cleopatra costume? No feeling the bicep of a man made of tiles?
Don't let red people reach into your European Men's Carry-all?
7. France is pigeon heaven. They are portly and plentiful. One even roosts in the window above my bed, tapping on the glass occasionally to make sure I’m awake.
8. The French love dogs. They take them everywhere, and let them go everywhere.
9. There may be nothing better in this world than a warm crêpe from a street vendor.
10. Robert De Niro has a side job with a circus.
Posted in Random, tagged Critters, France, Peeves, Rage, Travel on September 27, 2011| 4 Comments »
The fan gently hummed. The clock tower five feet from the headboard of my bed chimed the hour of four. I was tucked into crisp white sheets under a fluffy white duvet. I was about to slip back into slumber when I heard it.
Buzzzzz.
Too loud for a fly or a mosquito. This was a healthy, robust buzz. Powered by what I didn’t know, and wasn’t sure I wanted to find out.
I turned on the light. Hovering four feet above me was a massive winged creature. Like a yellow jacket that sampled the “Alice in Wonderland” cake. I squelched a squeal. (It wouldn’t do to yell; it is a very small village, and a noise like that surely would have awakened my coworker next door, or the students in the apartments across the narrow street.)
I grabbed a sweater and whipped the sleeve at it, Indiana Jones style.
The beast dropped out of the air. And disappeared. Completely. Like Michael Myers after Dr. Loomis shoots him over the railing.
There was no way I could go back to bed without knowing where it was, dead or alive.
I got a book and waited.
After about 10 minutes, I heard the tell-tale buzz (Poe had nothing on this). The winged devil rose from the floor on my left, a foot from my head. I sprang to my sweater. It flew out of the bedroom into the living room.
For about 10 more minutes, the beast and I created a spectacle straight out of a Looney Tunes cartoon. I finally trapped him in the folds of the sweater and flung him outside. He clung tenaciously to the fibers and demanded to come back in. I cursed (quietly) and shook harder. His creepy little legs at last released my cardigan.
Before I could close the window, he flew back inside.
At this point, I was really thankful no one could see in my windows. With renewed vigor (and while choking back a panicked gurgle), I sweater-snapped him again.
He stopped, dropped and rolled.
I pounced again with the sweater, gathered him up, tossed him out the window again, and shut it quickly.
I have no idea if he lived, but I know I didn’t go back to sleep.
Addendum:
After posting this account, I did some research (prompted by a comment on the post). I think I tangled with a European hornet, or Vespa crabro.
And perhaps I need to change the pronoun in the story to “she.”
Posted in Random, tagged Beer and wine, Bright ideas, Food, France on September 20, 2011| 2 Comments »
Lavender season is almost over. Harvest season is just beginning. Who needs flowers when you can feast?
Posted in Chickens, Random, tagged Bright ideas, Chickens, Food, France, Pecking order, Travel, Trish (the chicken) on September 18, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Anyone can post postcard-perfect pictures. (And yes, I will too.) In the past two days, though, I’ve been more interested in capturing critters.
A puny French version of the late Trish the Chicken
Puny Trish has a friend.
A literal version of "pigeonholed"
From birds to beasties (the praying mantis, that is, not me)
There's a whelk on that there limestone! (Say that with a Southern accent, please.)
Flowers? No.
Snails!
Apparently, if you put them in saltwater, the snails leave their shells. Then you put them on salad. Um ... yum?
Un escargot grand
Un escargot grand avec des amis
Next post: flora of France
Posted in Random, tagged Bright ideas, France, Travel on September 16, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Eddie and I visited Lacoste in 2006. I found out Tom Stoppard lived here. I took pictures of his garden. I hoped to casually run into him on Rue Saint Trophime. I went home disappointed.
Five years later, Tom has moved on. One of Lacoste’s local characters has a connection to Tom’s place, though, and I got to go inside. I saw what he saw and where he sat.
The starstruck aspiring screenwriter in me squealed at this: the desk where he wrote “Shakespeare in Love.”
I imagined him taking writing breaks to walk through his garden or lounge in his pool.
I imagined him eating brie on a baguette while sitting on his terrace.
That's not Tom.
I imagined him gazing up at the Marquis de Sade’s chateau, seeking inspiration.
I imagined myself writing this blog post as an ode to a former Lacoste resident whose work I appreciate. Sadly, this post won’t lead to any Oscars.
Posted in Random, tagged Bright ideas, France, Kids, Loneliness, Peeves, Travel on September 13, 2011| 7 Comments »
Home, sweet home.
This is my temporary home in Lacoste, France:
My street and apartment
I left my real home on Sunday with tissues stuffed in my bra to help me through the emotional experience of leaving Eddie and the kids. After many hours breathing recycled airplane air (three planes), wrangling suitcases (one large, three small), and enduring the wrath of Sue Sylvester serving as flight attendant on the longest flight, I made it to my final destination in the south of France.
It has been an action-packed 20 hours since I arrived. I’ll spare you the play-by-play. Here are the highlights:
One of the best parts of the town tour today was an impromptu peek into Tom Stoppard‘s former residence. I’ll share the photos later.
For now, though, je suis fatigué!
À bientôt!
Posted in Random, tagged Beer and wine, Bright ideas, France, French, Loneliness, Parenting, Rednecks, Students, Travel on September 5, 2011| 3 Comments »
In one week, this village will be my new home:
It’s only temporary, though.
The university that employs me has a study-abroad campus in the South of France. I was lucky enough to be selected to teach writing courses there in the fall.
Here are the answers to the Top Five questions I’m asked:
Although I’ll still post images of grammar mistakes in the wild, this blog will change focus a bit.
Perhaps a temporary blog title is appropriate.
Perhaps “A Redneck in Provence.”
 | Beth on I’d like my taco to go … |
 | kfirebaugh2015 on I’d like my taco to go … |
| Beth on I’d like my taco to go … |
 | Martha Kennedy on I’d like my taco to go … |
 | halffastcyclingclub on I’d like my taco to go … |
Observe and report 