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Posts Tagged ‘Kids’

As you know, the wing-clipping didn’t work; Trish leaves her yard every day and roams the neighborhood. We’ve become “those people.” But I wonder which is worse: a huge, burning pile of refuse (thanks, Wayne) or a chicken with a sense of adventure.

Dominic is as interested in her poop as I am, it appears. He informed me this morning that he noticed some on the driveway where she has been moseying around. He asked me when I was going to clean it up.

Here is an image of Trish roosting in the crape myrtle at sunset. I’d like to see Thomas Kinkade tackle this.

Trish in her tree

Trish in her tree

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Yet another poop post

It’s been a crap-tastic week, literally and figuratively. There is a lot going on right now, and not a lot of it is good. Family health issues, mainly. Dissertation procrastination also.

Dominic just capped off the week with a shout from the bathroom: “Mama, will you wipe my butt?” Sigh. I’m going to remind him of this when I meet his first girlfriend. And much, much later, I’ll shout it myself in the nursing home. Ah, the joy of being very old or very young.

Suri Cruise poop sculpture

Suri Cruise poop sculpture

Above loveliness is from this article.

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I don’t usually consider the poop of others, unless one of my sons is telling me about his, or one of the dogs has to go out. However, I was forced to consider Trish the chicken and her system when I saw this:

The frightening thing is that I almost slipped in it. Yes, I would have posted a photo of that. I have no shame.

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I had to have the following conversation with my neighbor’s middle-aged son.

Me, at the front door: “Um, hi. Sorry to bother you, but have you seen my chicken?”

Him: “Oh that’s yours? My dad was going to go buy some feed.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s mine. She learned how to get out and now we can’t find her. If you see her, she answers to the name of ‘Trish.'”

Him: “I had some chickens when I lived in Pooler. They are unusual animals.”

Occasionally, Trish has flown the coop. Once nabbed and returned, she usually stays in for a few days. Yesterday, though, she was bold. Every time Eddie and I went outside, she was out of her yard. We must have captured her six times. And Eddie was mad because she kept kicking the pine straw out of the flower beds.

Today, we came home around lunchtime and she was gone. Yes, I walked around our house and the neighborhood hollering “Trish!” and feeling like a buffoon. I figured I would only worry if she didn’t return to the coop at night.

I started to wash my car and I heard Dominic yelling, “Mama, I found Trish!” I looked up and saw him coming from the side yard holding Trish to his chest. She seemed oddly content. Apparently, she had been amusing herself near the backyard fence. I don’t know how I could have missed her when I was walking around.

I knew it was time to clip her wings to avoid future AWOLs. Trish = grounded.

Clipping in progress

Clipping in progress

The clipped wing

The result. No birds were harmed in the clipping of the wing.

The boys give Trish some love

We’re rednecks. My shirtless kids like to hang out with the chicken.

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Brussels sprouts

Yes, that is how the vegetable is spelled. Brussels sprouts are members of the Brassicaceae (cabbage) family, and are pretty much universally reviled. I’ve recently discovered a love for them, but only the way I prepare them: cut in half, braised in sesame oil then sautéed in sea salt and garlic. Yummy. Trust me. If you need evidence, consider this: Both my kids like them. Last night, in fact, Gideon said, “We love you because you cook Brussels sprouts.” He really did say that.

I’m sure it is because we told them it builds muscles. And, because they are Batman and Superman, they care about big muscles. It is all in the presentation, folks.

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