Most colleges offer students the opportunity to give feedback on their classes and/or professors. The university for which I work releases the evaluations, which consist of a statistical section and a comments section, roughly two weeks after the end of the quarter.
I await the comments section with excitement laced with crippling fear. People like to be liked, and professors are people too. There is always a comment that makes me so happy I want call my boss and read it to him over the phone.
And then there is the other kind.
There’s always one student who hates my guts, or hates something about the class that I may or may not be able to change. And that negative comment lingers in my mind like the last drunk guest at a house party.
I learn from all the comments, even the ones that make me reach for the Cymbalta. I appreciate the constructive criticism, because I want my classes to be interesting, useful and fun. And I want to keep my job.
Spring quarter’s Cloud Nine comment was this one from a graduate student in the Promotional Writing class:
The case studies & examples of things that are currently happening partnered with student presentations were an excellent tool to utilize.
To the disinterested reader, this may seem like a positive, if pedestrian, comment. But to readers of this blog, this is a sentence that reveals a deliberate attempt to yank my chain (in a good way) by combining four of my pet peeves: ampersands and the words “currently,” “partnered” and “utilize.” Well done!
Spring quarter’s Cymbalta comment was this one from an undergraduate student in the Writing for the Web class:
I really wish she would explain her assignments.
Such an innocuous comment. I could accept it, except that I posted an assignment sheet for every assignment, and each sheet detailed everything I expected and how I would grade the assignment. And I went over each assignment sheet in class. Twice.
Of course, the evaluations are anonymous. I have my suspicions as to who wrote the comment, but I can’t be sure. I practically beg students to talk to me if they have problems in the class or want clarification. I wish the writer of the comment could have elaborated on what, exactly, was lacking because, in my (drunk-littered) mind, I’ve done everything I could possibly do.
Sigh.
Cymbalta, anyone?
Observe and report 
Well, as a former student, I can tell you that your explanation of assignments is on point. In fact, I got my only B at SCAD, both grad and undergrad, because I did not read the syllabus like I should have and missed one thing. I was mad at the professor, but it was my fault. She didn’t take class time to explain what she clearly spelled out on the syllabus, and she certainly did not care to hear my excuse for misreading it.
This is college not grammar school. Grow up! In the real world your boss is not going to sit down and ask if you need him/her to repeat everything two or three times. No, they will just find someone who can read and follow directions.
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Professor, you are so professional and should not worry about anything. I believe what you have there are two lovely as pie evaluations. You are doing a better job then certain professors who have been on campus since the place opened. You would not believe the illegal antics that took place on the NYC off campus program. Deans of departments were seen throwing dishes in bars and certain faculty members would preach about professionalism while stoned. You would never pull any of those stunts. You have never cancelled class to go to yoga or to go to Olive Garden. You never complain about how hard it is to be a professor. I never felt the need to put, “arrogant bastard” or “camp counselor” on any of your evaluations.
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Oh wow. You are right. That second one is lovely as pie in comparison. And thank you so much!
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The only way you could have made your assignments more clear is if you illustrated the instructions or came home with me and stood over my shoulder to swat at me when I did something wrong.
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Maybe I should start offering that service as part of my office hours.
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I personally think interpretative dance could have been instrumental in clarifying assignments.
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Excellent idea! You know how I love interpretive dance!
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I totally agree with Holly.
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Beth,
During my years as a supervisor, I read many evaluations of faculty. My all-time favorite? “No more Michael Jackson music.”
The favorite one written about me? “Professor S. is too nonchalant.” If you made a list of the top ten words that do not apply to me, nonchalant would be up there.
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Oh boy! I’ve had some very interesting comments, but nothing quite like that.
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