Observe and report

Dear Honey Boo Boo:

Let me just say right off the bat that I love you. I think you are a funny, charming attention hog just like other 6-year-olds. There’s nothing appalling, earth-shattering or world-ending about your behavior.

It’s your mom who is unusual.

It has nothing to do with her so-called “forklift foot.”

It has nothing to do with her dreadful eating habits, which extend to the rest of the family (and to the rest of America, truth be told).

It also has nothing to do with her “criminal past” — a 2008 stint in jail for unpaid child support for your half-sister.

No, what is unusual about your mom is that, unlike many reality TV moms (and reality TV people in general), she appears to be the same on camera as she is off.

I love her as much as I love you, and I think she is also completely charming.

Many folks are on the warpath about your show, lamenting the decline of Western civilization and all that nonsense. Even Kris Jenner — that fine upstanding example of motherhood — has attacked your mom, claiming she exploits your family for money.  Because Kris Jenner would NEVER do that.

But I’ve defended your mom, you and your show. In my opinion, she and the rest of your family set a good example in one important way:

You clearly love each other and enjoy spending time together.

Sure, many people would look down their noses at going mudbogging, attending the Redneck Games, and hanging out at a rural water park.

But you know I’m not like many people. In fact, I bobbed for pigs’ feet at the games in the round after your sister. So I understand.

In a world filled with so much artifice, it is refreshing to see a family that approaches “real” more than any other family on television. For better or worse.

I guess the family that farts together, stays together.

You and your family should just keep on doing what you do. I’ll watch, which will make TLC happy, and will bring you more money for your trust fund.

You just try to ignore the critics. They don’t have to watch if they don’t like it.

See you Wednesday!
Beth