Observe and report

Dear Readers,

On this day of thanksgiving, I want to share with you the (admittedly random) things for which I am thankful, beyond the usual gratefulness for family, friends and health. I am thankful for (in no particular order):

1. A husband who isn’t a lazy, fat slob (even if he has gone too far the other way and joined the Crossfit Cult)
2. Artistic children
3. The Avengers (specifically Thor and Iron Man)
4. The ability to visit friends in far-flung places such as Abu Dhabi
5. A job that I love
6. Funny and talented colleagues
7. The words “qi,” “za” and “jo” that are so handy in Words With Friends
8. Apple (in our house: iPhone 5, iPhone 4S, MacBook Air, two iPads, two MacBook Pros and stock in Apple for obvious reasons)
9. Bacon
10. Stan Lee
11. Adobo seasoning
12. Full-coverage underwear
13. Crocs (I know they are butt-ugly, but they are so useful)
14. This
15. Honey Boo Boo
16. Puréed pumpkin in the freezer awaiting pie-making at Christmas
17. Stephen King and his gloriously messed-up imagination
18. Parker’s growlers
19. Facebook and Twitter
20. The word “moist” (A polarizing word, “moist,” but perfectly descriptive)

Here is what I could do without:

1. The word “penetration” used in sports
2. Any recent Patricia Cornwell books
3. Poetry (Sorry.)
4. Thongs
5. Green peppers
6. Mosquitoes, flies, sand gnats, telemarketers, talk show hosts and other pesky creatures
7. The 24-hour news cycle that causes the focus to be on the salacious rather than the serious
8. Men who don’t trim their ear and nose hair
9. Pinterest, Instagram and Tumblr
10. Any of the “real housewives”
11. Burlap
12. Strip malls
13. Steven Seagal
14. Fad diets such as Paleo, Zone, Atkins, etc. (just eat more fruits and vegetables, fewer sugary things, and exercise more, people!)
15. Boys’ pants with unreinforced knees
16. Knickknacks
17. Chicago Manual of Style
18. Anthony Bourdain
19. Golf
20. “Talking points” instead of just talking

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
Beth