Dear West Chatham YMCA,
I’ve been a member since you opened. My family and I have taken advantage of the gym, the classes, Kid Fit, the summer and holiday camps — almost everything you have to offer.
We may never again use the pool, though. (And it is not because of a “Code Brown.”)
Dominic complained this summer about having to attend Y camp because of all the rules, especially in the pool. As he is the child of mine who likes to push boundaries, I ignored him. I assumed he wanted to jump off the top of the slide or play WWE with his brother in the shallow end.
Oh no.
I saw for myself what he meant. Here are some of the rules I discovered in just 30 minutes.
You cannot:
• Run around the pool.
• Walk fast around the pool.
• Go near the pool when they are testing the pH.
• Dive.
• Swim under the lane markers.
• Follow too closely on the slide.
• Go down head-first on the slide.
• Go down backward on the slide.
• Go down sitting on the slide.
• Twist your body while going down the slide.
• Wear goggles while going down the slide.
• Stay too long in the shallow area once you’ve gone down the slide.
• Get out of the pool any way but via the stairs.
• Play in the water under the slide even if there is no one else in the pool.
• Jump into the pool any way but feet first.
• Go anywhere near people who are taking lessons.
• Yell with glee.
Each of these rules was announced by the lifeguard, prefaced by “Hey, Buddy!”
At one point, I actually whipped around and said, “What now?!?”
And this is coming from someone who appreciates rules.
Some of them I can certainly understand (running and diving seem like guaranteed tickets to the ER). Others, not so much.
What you’ve really guaranteed is a no-fun zone, patrolled by 16-year-old dictators hopped up on a little power.
I realize you have these rules because of fear of litigation. I understand personal responsibility is nearly nonexistent in Amurka.
Allow me, please, to decide what’s safe and not safe for my children (within reason, of course) when I am in the water supervising. I promise I won’t sue. I’ll even sign a waiver.
I’m a member. Don’t you have to at least pretend to care what I think?
Thank you for your consideration of this request.
Beth
Observe and report 
This is a great post. I definitely appreciate the intent to keep kids safe, but sometimes all those rules can rule out all the fun. We had a similar experience at a community pool without lifeguards. Sometimes a childless adult will take it upon him/herself to enforce pool rules (both posted and imagined) when the exuberance of the kids becomes irksome. A woman, taking up an inordinate amount of space with her massive inflatable raft, repeatedly wagged her finger at my daughters and told them sternly not to jump in the pool, despite the fact that they were taking great care to avoid splashing her. We had a little standoff when I explained that I reserve the right to supervise my kids without uninvited interference and enforce the rules (or not) at my discretion. Fortunately, it didn’t put too much of a damper on the day.
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YES! Good grief! An inflatable raft in the pool? Give me a break!
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we too are members of an overzealous YMCA pool. my favorite is watching the rules get selectively enforced. ugggh.
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