Dear readers (and, I hope, fellow lovers of language):
I need a break from the 2016 election.
Let’s talk about the serial comma (also called the Oxford comma) for a moment. We’ve all seen the following to advocate for its use:
But here’s the thing: I would use a colon to clarify if I really meant that JFK and Stalin had side jobs. My sentence would read:
We invited the strippers: JFK and Stalin.
If I meant that JFK, Stalin and some ladies working their way through college were all coming to the party, I would write:
We invited JFK, Stalin and the strippers.
I’m a fan of improving clarity by rewriting. No need to overwork the comma and use it for a simple series.
However, we cannot give the comma a gold watch and say goodbye. We still need it. And some people certainly appreciate it. (Read this from the bottom up.)

Email courtesy of 36-hour Tina
We also need articles or bad things happen.
A “the” before “pen” would have made all the difference. (Or even a bigger space before “is.”)
What we don’t need is random quotation marks — not even one random quotation mark, as seen in the photo below. (By the way, quotation marks come in pairs. That’s how they work. But if the signmaker had added another, we’d be wondering what the dogs are actually doing.)

Image courtesy of Angela DeVore
Please send me your sign/email/meme fails in the comments or via Twitter (@BethCon5). I think we all will be needing more election breaks over the next 45 days.
Love,
Beth
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