Dear Coronavirus:
You’ve affected every aspect of my life and the lives of others, but I guess we won’t be meeting in person. At least not right now.
I was sure we had a date. You remember.
So I submitted myself to your truly heinous screening process:
I drove through a tent where people in hazmat suits stuck a stick up my nose, carved out some of my brain, and tried to pop out my eye from the back.
This could be me if the woman had a death grip on the steering wheel.That’s how it felt.
They said they’d let me know if you were ready for me.
But to borrow from and butcher the work of Randy Travis:
Since my email still ain’t pinging,
I assume it still ain’t you.
And that’s really for the best. All your exes say you aren’t fun.
Kthanksbye,
Beth
UPDATE (July 5 at 7:51 p.m.): I finally got an email. Negative, as I suspected. But peace of mind is everything!
Observe and report 
Prayers for you and that you don’t have it. And, I have a name of a great testing place that comes to your house so you dont have to wait in line.
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I had an appointment, so I was in and out (with watering eye) in less than 15 minutes.
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Wow. I hope the worst that happens is that test. ❤
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