
Dear Mean Girl,
You actively sabotaged me.
You lied about me to ruin my reputation and stall my career.
You friended me on Facebook to gather information then defriended me when your nasty work was done.
But I guess I should thank you.
In the words of Christina Aguilera (whom I never thought I’d quote):
After all you put me through
You’d think I’d despise you
But in the end, I wanna thank you
‘Cause you made me that much stronger.
I met up with someone recently who knew you when you were just starting out. You did the same thing to that person that you did to me.
So I know it wasn’t personal: You’ve got a history. A pattern. A way. It’s like that parable (and song) about the snake: “You knew I was a snake when you took me in.”
It’s sad, really.
It’s hard enough for women to succeed without other women dragging them down.
Being in a leadership role is not like having pie: Some for me doesn’t mean less for you.
Anyway. Our circles no longer intersect, and now I’m better off.
If you hadn’t made my life miserable, I wouldn’t have focused on finding new opportunities. And I now love my job.
So thank you.
Yep. They are everywhere. I have not worked or lived in a place where at least one of these reprehensible c*&^s didn’t show up.
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I don’t understand it. We should be supporting each other!
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I think it’s in our DNA maybe competing for men = competing at life — but I also think some people are just mean and stupid. I have three neighbors, all women, older women. Two in their 80s and the other my age. One of the older women just plain doesn’t like me and will intentionally ruin a social interaction to make sure I know that. Why? It’s pointless. No one’s job is hanging in the balance. No man. Nothing. I don’t know how the other two women feel about her because I just don’t gossip, but the one who’s my age has made a special effort to let me know she saw what happened last time we were all together. It’s just bizarre. There is NO bone of contention between four elderly ladies sharing an alley. If anything, we should help each other. As far as I can tell, she’s envious of my ability to draw and my education. Well? OK. She calls me “privileged.” Anyway, she’s just a typical, stupid, catty, competitive bitch. I don’t think there is anything rational about it. Rational women do support each other.
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I’m trying to be charitable here: Who hurt these people that they want to be this way?
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In this woman’s case, her husband who didn’t take care of himself and died. SHE takes it personally as if he did it to HER. My mom was that kind of woman and yeah, she hurt so bad she figured she had to hurt everyone else. Rational people don’t do that. For my money, it doesn’t matter. They get the pay off they want which is people don’t deal with them and they get to savor the pain which has come to define them to themselves. It’s sad but I no longer care very much. I just stay away.
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Right. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. It’s sad, but there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s best to stay away from toxic people.
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Yeah. But the problem is you never know when you’ll run into another one. I don’t want to turn into the person who’s looking for them, either. That’s them winning. ❤
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Ugh. I wish I knew more about this because it would be educational, and at the same time I’m glad I don’t know more about this evil. Jeebus. Were you able to repair your reputation and expose the slanderer?
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No. She won. At least at that place. But I’ve moved on to a better place where she isn’t.
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OK, this is one of those moments when a person chooses what they focus on… *deep breath* Glad you’re in a better place.
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When I was in kindergarten, at my very first parent-teacher conference, my teacher told my mother, “Lynn doesn’t understand why the other children are mean to each other.” And I still don’t! I am absolutely baffled by this sort of behavior.
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It seems to me to be NORMAL to question meanness. Mine didn’t have any female friends. That’s a huge red flag.
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