Observe and report

Dear Friends and Family,

Oregon is an interesting place. The people are fascinating.

I’m used to eccentric people. I lived in Savannah for many years, after all.

But Oregon takes it to a new level. It seems like everyone I’ve met is some version of “different” — meaning not mainstream or like anyone I’ve ever met. (I know there is no “normal.”)

Like the lady who waxed my eyebrows while telling me about her life as an escort.

Or the collection of people I met on a recent Tuesday night.

I’m trying to build a friend network. My next-door neighbor invited me to a get-together billed as a game night.

It was not a game night — certainly not in the way I described my cards-and-wine night with neighbors in St. Louis.

Only one person — “James” — knew most of the people in the group. Most of the seven people were meeting for the first time at one woman’s house.

It was a disparate group.

The guests:

Amy: Neighbor. Identifies as gay and uses she/her pronouns.

“James,” formerly Jamie: Amy was certain the pronouns used are they/them, but James’ partner used she/her.

Charlie: James’ partner. No pronouns used. In transition, but it’s unclear which direction.

Francis: A midwife and psychic/medium who uses they/them. Also wears a turban to casual events. As one does.

Brielle: She/her. Was in a polyamorous relationship. Fell in love with a different partner. Now divorcing her husband to be monogamous with new man who lives in Chile.

K—-: I wish I could remember her actual name. It was so unusual with an unusual spelling that I couldn’t get a handle on it. I wish I could have written it down. (I’m old. I need to write things down.) Her house was the gathering point. Straight woman (she/her) with husband and kids.

Obviously, I like my neighbor. And Brielle and K—- seemed lovely. I couldn’t get a read on James.

Meanwhile, there was Charlie and Francis. I could happily live my whole life without seeing them again.

The two of them had main-character syndrome. That party wasn’t big enough for both of them.

Charlie would ask someone a question, then start talking to James or Amy and not listen to the answer. Others were listening though. Then Charlie would jump back into the conversation and not know what was happening. Then ask more questions to which Charlie wouldn’t listen.

And here’s one of my exchanges with Francis:

Me: So when did you realize you were psychic?

Francis: A lot of people have asked me that question.

Extended pause.

Me: And?

Francis: My father was always very supportive.

Me: That’s great! So when did you know you had an ability others didn’t?

Francis: Well, I just had so much death in my life. I felt I could feel their energy.

Uh huh. So I call bullshit on Francis. I’m sorry, but if you had this gift, wouldn’t you be able to pinpoint the moment you knew you were differently abled? Am I wrong here?

Anyway, it was a weird night. Another adjective to use is exhausting.

Amy asked me if I had a good time. I can be diplomatic sometimes. I talked about how fun I thought Brielle and K—- were.

Amy: And the others?

Me: James seemed very quiet.

Amy: James is always quiet when Charlie is around.

Yeah, I bet.

Later, Amy told me Charlie asked if Charlie could be Amy’s roommate. That would make Charlie my neighbor too. It took every ounce of restraint not to scream “NOOOO!”

Luckily, Amy reported this week that the two of them met, and Amy’s place is not really the best option for Charlie at this time.

[Audible sigh of relief]

I’m sure Charlie and Francis are beloved by others. They don’t need me.

I’m working on other friendships.

Winery Wendy and I went to my town’s new beer fest last weekend. It replaced the annual Turkeyrama. (You know I would have loved to go to that.)

The beer fest was … underattended. I don’t think they advertised at all. Wendy and I were two of maybe 15 people hanging out in a hot-assed insurance company parking lot.

Unlike most beer fests where breweries set up their own stations, this one had two trucks with a bunch of options. Strange, but the outcome was the same: I got to try a bunch of local beer.

The music was good too. Maybe next year the organizers will actually promote the event.

Anyway, as you can tell, I’m fine: I’m meeting all sorts of people. And liking most of them.

Of course I’ll keep you posted on my journey.

Love,
Beth

*when you’re a stranger.

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