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Posts Tagged ‘Bright ideas’

My husband made me do it

Posted in Random, tagged , , , , , , , , on January 22, 2010| 6 Comments »

In 2005, when SCAD was considering offering a writing major, I thought to myself, “Self, it would be great to teach in that department.” Though I had oodles of work experience, I knew that SCAD’s accrediting body prefers terminal degrees in the field of instruction. So I had two choices: Get another M.F.A. (the one I have is in performing arts) or get a Ph.D. I chose the latter.

I had three criteria in mind as I researched programs: areas of study offered (journalism or communications), proximity and reputation. The one that fulfilled all these requirements was University of South Carolina.

Eddie badgered me to apply. “But that would require taking the GRE!” I whined. “And I’m pregnant!”

“So?” he said, with very little compassion, I might add.

Lest you think he is heartless, his philosophy was that I might as well get on it while the kids were very young. That way I would be done when they got old enough to start extracurricular activities that I wouldn’t want to miss.

I knew he was right. I forced myself to take the GRE and apply to the doctoral program in the USC School of Journalism and Mass Communications. I was accepted, and began coursework Fall 2006. The total courses involved for most folks: 16 (48 semester hours). For me: 18 (because my master’s is not in the specific area).

I finished the coursework in April 2009. I spent the summer procrastinating on my dissertation proposal, and dreading the comprehensive exams (four days, three hours a day of answering questions in four areas: theory, methods, ethics and rhetoric, which is my outside area). I passed the foreign language proficiency test in October (see related post). The comps dread continued.

The time came, though, for me to put up or shut up. I studied my haunches off in preparation for the comps, which I stupidly scheduled for the week after Thanksgiving. The 19 people in my house for the holiday might not have fully understood why I was so stressed out.

Along with the written comps, there is an oral defense. That happened today. After my committee slowly roasted me over an open fire for two hours, they decreed that I had passed. To be honest, the first 20 minutes were horrendous, but then the rest was fine. The discussion will help me hone my dissertation proposal, for sure.

And that is the next step. I defend said proposal in front of my committee Feb. 19. Once I pass (the power of positive thinking), I will work exclusively on my own research for my dissertation. Then I will have to defend my dissertation in front of the same committee. Thumbs up, and my hooding awaits. Thumbs down, and … well, that’s really not an option for me.

So if I look a little frazzled in February (and over the summer), you’ll know why.

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Rescue 911: The punctuation version

Posted in Grammar, etc., tagged , , , , on January 20, 2010| 5 Comments »

Tonight I became “that person.” But I did what I had to do.

I couldn’t just sit there and let it continue to happen.

I answered the call. The call of the abused apostrophe.

Though I love, LOVE my children’s school, I am sometimes surprised by the notes that come home. Notes about “Dress-down Fridays” bothered me greatly. They bothered me because they advertised “Dress Down Friday’s.”

I could hear the abused apostrophe screaming.

I let it go, for a time.

But tonight in the PTO meeting, I heeded the call. The chair asked for corrections to the minutes. I saw my opportunity and took it. I begged him to allow Friday to be plural, not possessive. “Let the minutes reflect the change,” said the chair. And the apostrophe and I wept.

Afterward, a couple of other parents thanked me. And there was much rejoicing.

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Part V: Happily ever after

Posted in Random, tagged , , , on January 20, 2010| 6 Comments »

… crickets … crickets … crickets …

Yes, I know the silence here has been deafening. I’ve got a good excuse: dissertation proposal. That is the cause of the many gray hairs I’ve found over the past few days. Seriously. My doctoral work is causing gray hair.

But back to the story.

SHE SAID:

Eddie and I officially started dating Sept. 27, 1994. Three months later, on Dec. 31, 1994, Eddie and I and our two friends, Alex and Brenon, headed to City Market to ring in the new year with a dropping peach and dropping drunks.

A few minutes to midnight, Alex and Brenon cleared a little spot in the melee and Eddie dropped to one knee and proposed. I was a little stunned, and was uncharacteristically quiet. Eddie said, “You have just a couple of minutes to say yes!” I did, of course.

HE SAID:

I thought she was going to begin another waiting game! Beth is never one to be short on words, but this day she did not say much. Dare I say, she was speechless.

SHE SAID:

While our families thought it was very sudden, our friends were not surprised at all and just wondered why it took so long. (Heidi, I’m talking about you.)

HE SAID:

Yeah, her friends were all on my side.

SHE SAID:

We got married in Forsyth Park Sept. 9, 1995. We deliberately chose an easy date to remember (9.9.95) because neither of us is good with remembering dates. This is why I have a journal.

HE SAID:

I loved having a rainbow wedding party.  All those guys have remained good friends through all these years. I can remember hugging Dad (Beth’s Dad) and we both had tears. I said, “I’ve always wanted a Dad.” He said, “I always wanted a son.” Dad has really been the dad I never had. He is an awesome person.

SHE SAID:

Ten years and many adventures later, we added Dominic to our family, followed by Gideon.

HE SAID:

It’s crazy how little things — such as writing about  how you met — can make you think about how great your partner is. This has been fun, and I can’t come close to telling everyone how Beth has changed my life. She took a character like me and made me a much better person. Now she gave me two awesome boys, and I can’t get enough of them. She is a great mom, which is number one on the list of her many great traits.

SHE SAID:

Our life together so far has been pretty great. And that’s an understatement.

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Part III: This is getting ridiculous

Posted in Random, tagged , , on January 11, 2010| 3 Comments »

When last we saw Beth and Eddie, Eddie had asked for permission from the president of the college to date Beth. Beth had said she would go out with him if he got permission. He did, and she didn’t.

SHE SAID

Yes, it was stupid. I know. I could have saved myself plenty of angst. The relationship with the reporter continued its death spiral until April 1994. He had moved out of town by this point and I was thinking of joining him. I even found a job. At the very last moment possible, the small voice of reason inside finally broke free (think Jojo’s “yop” from “Horton Hears a Who”). I backed out of the job, and the “relationship,” such as it was, dissolved.

This is where Beth gets her groove back, thanks to Eddie.

I switched from PR at SCAD to reporting at a local television station. Like a true multitasker, I also started doing weather on Sundays, and serving as a DJ for the country station connected to the TV station. Free concert tickets — woohoo! I hadn’t previously been a country music fan, but that all changed during my tenure as K.C. Quinn. (I couldn’t use my real name, of course, because I was a reporter and that would be weird. I wanted to be called Moonpie Jones, but they wouldn’t let me.)

After the breakup, I quickly took up with another reporter in town, but was considering other options.

HE SAID

I am not sure, but I think she is talking here about the man with the concaved chest I referred to as “Stick Figure.”

SHE SAID

I had a chance to go to the Sawyer Brown/Tim McGraw/Diamond Rio concert, and I decided to take Eddie. We had begun chatting quite regularly at this point, but it was all strictly platonic.

HE SAID

I couldn’t believe she finally called me to ask for a date. “A country concert? I’m sure I’ll find lots of lively Puerto Ricans there,” I thought. But undeterred, I saw my chance and took it. I’d never been to a country concert. Sawyer who? Wasn’t he in a book? But it was Beth, so I went. I like all kinds of music, and I did have a good time.

SHE SAID

It was this night that Eddie informed me that I should lay off the dudes for six months, just date casually, and figure out what I really wanted. Bold, no?

HE SAID

It was all part of my master plan. The friend in me wanted her to stop trying to date people seriously for a while. The guy in me wanted her to continue her behavior and date me next. But she was never going to be happy until she figured out what she really wanted. And I was hoping it was me. You know, that whole “letting the bird go” thing.

SHE SAID

After the concert, I drove him home. If you are wondering why he never drove, it is because he had a craptastic Civic that barely fit one person, and it was always broken down. Sexy.

HE SAID

That’s why I walked a lot.

SHE SAID

In the parking lot of his apartment, we had our first kiss.

HE SAID

The kiss was very nice.

SHE SAID

But it was very short and sweet. He broke it off, and I said, “That’s it? I waited years for that?”

He said, “You played hard to get, and now it is my turn.”

I was hooked.

But I did what he said. For once.

Up next: The jig is up

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Chicken-terlude

Posted in Chickens, tagged , , , , , on January 10, 2010| 2 Comments »

We interrupt the Beth and Eddie story with a brief word from our chicken.

Trish has not made an appearance in a while, either on this blog or in real life. It’s been too darn cold, and she has been holed up in her coop. I wanted to make sure she was OK, so I went out bearing a seed treat for her. She charged out of her coop and flew up onto my arm like some kind of parrot.

We now return you to our regularly scheduled blogging. Part III will appear tomorrow.

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Part II: The pursuit begins

Posted in Random, tagged , on January 9, 2010| 6 Comments »

SHE SAID

While I remember the box incident clearly, I don’t remember anything else specifically about Eddie for a little while. I had a lot going on.

My three-year relationship with my college boyfriend was tanking because of the four-hour distance between Savannah and Atlanta. Well, that and because I was beginning a dalliance with a particular television reporter in Savannah. The boyfriend and I parted ways (relatively amicably, I thought, yet apparently not as he refuses to be my Facebook friend). Serial monogamist that I was, I started seriously dating the reporter.

HE SAID

I remember this boyfriend; he seemed very “Oh well! Que sera, sera.” I met this little guy, and I like him. It’s a bit sad he doesn’t want to be friends with Beth. If we went our separate ways, I would always want to be friends with Beth. If you can understand her, she is a great and loyal friend. She continues to be friends with people — yes, even guys — who I don’t think are worthy of her friendship. So he is making a bad choice.

SHE SAID

Eddie first appears in my journal in the Sept. 4, 1992, entry. I went to Malone’s (now Wild Wing Café) with my best girl friend and her friend, and ran into Eddie: “We told each other our life stories and then I drove him home.”

I wish I could go back in time and slap around the person I was. The reporter and I should have dated for about a month, but the soap opera dragged on for well over a year. It seems so clear now that I had no business being with someone about whom I wrote journal entries such as “We were arguing in line at Dumbo” and “The evening turned sour when I realized how unwilling he is to do the things I think are fun.”

HE SAID

I remember said evening at Malone’s. I also remember thinking, “Aaaw shiiit — she can dance too!” And I remember the reporter dude. I knew right away he really didn’t care that much about her. So I really didn’t care if he saw me talking to his girl. He cared more about going golfing than spending the day with his girlfriend. Fine with me! And thank you, kind sir! Don’t mind if I do step right on in here and steal your girlfriend.

I assure you my friends, if a man tried the things I tried in front of my face, there would be consequences.

SHE SAID

Anyway, there was a point where I was almost smart enough to ditch the reporter. Back to the journal, Jan. 10, 1993: “I went to the SCAD/Millsaps basketball game … at the game, Eddie asked me out again. He looked quite alluring, but I resisted.” And here’s one from Jan. 19, 1993: “Eddie is becoming increasingly hard to resist.” Apparently, he said to me on that day, “Let’s get married.”

Part of my resistance to Eddie had to do with the fact that he was a full-time student at SCAD in addition to being a full-time employee. Faculty and staff were/are prohibited from fraternizing with students, and I tend to be a stickler for the rules.

On Feb. 17, 1993, I wrote, “I can’t stop thinking about Eddie now. He came by today and said he was going to get permission from Richard (Rowan, the SCAD president at the time) to date me. If he does, I will.”

Well, he did, and I didn’t. Even after a permission-conveying phone call from my boss, the (amused) executive vice president, it took another 14 months for us to go on our first official date.

HE SAID

Readers, readers, readers — fear not! I  am a persistent man. Yes, I could have said “Well, later for you then, girl” but I knew she was special. If a woman can be that loyal to guys who treat her like crap, imagine what she’ll do for a man who thinks she’s great!

Up next: The first date

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A night to remember (maybe)

Posted in Random, tagged , , , on January 4, 2010| Leave a Comment »

It’s an odd evening in our house. Eddie is trying to learn some new moves for the kickboxing class he is teaching tomorrow. He hasn’t taught it in a while because of his shoulder surgery. And, of course, the kids can’t stand someone doing anything without them. So this is the scene:

Gideon is actually pretty good at getting the moves. Dominic just wants to play.

Anyway, the really odd aspect is that Eddie had a hard time getting some of the moves because they run contrary to his training as an actual boxer. So I had to help.

Shocking, I know.

Especially considering that I shun exercise (obviously). And the fact that I was incapable of learning drill team or cheerleading moves well enough to be chosen for the squads in high school. But I did learn the heck out of some ice skating choreography. Everyone has some latent ability somewhere, I guess.

Now I think I need to ice my quads.

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A contest!

Posted in Grammar, etc., tagged , , , , on January 3, 2010| 6 Comments »

In the words of that prophet Whitney Houston, “I believe that children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way.” Yet how are they supposed to learn correct English when adults don’t even know?

Case in point: The “top secret” file that came with Dominic’s Iron Man action figure.

Top secret file

There are two glaring errors of the homonym variety. The first readers of this blog who identify the two errors win lovely virtual prizes.

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The non-resolutions

Posted in Random, tagged , , on December 31, 2009| 1 Comment »

I resolve not to make any New Year’s resolutions. If you are going to do something, you should just do it and not wait for a particular date. That’s why I loathe Valentine’s Day. Shouldn’t you love someone all year, instead of just one particular day? (Eddie must love this point of view; it keeps him off the Hallmark treadmill.)

That being said, 1.1.10 seems like a very good date to begin projects I’ve been putting off, such as organizing photos, my home office, the checkbook, etc. I also plan to de-lard my haunches. Not all crazy-like, just some trimming of the padding I put on with Trish the Human on the dock this summer.

I’m looking forward to 2010. Except for my new job, fantastic students and boss, and some fun times with Eddie, the kids and our friends, 2009 sucked ass. Deaths and health problems galore. We’re ending the year dealing with hateful, trash-talking relatives. SIGH.

So, welcome to you, 2010. I’m resolved and ready!

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A mouth-watering holiday post

Posted in Random, tagged , , , on December 24, 2009| 3 Comments »

I could give Rachael Ray a run for her money. I’ve baked four different kinds of cookies over the past two days.

Gingerbread, Hamantaschen, Peanut Butter Munchies and Snow-caps

The pumpkin pie is in the oven, and I plan to make empanadas for dinner. The pernil al horno for tomorrow is rolling around in special spices in the refrigerator. I might make some Christmas bark this afternoon.

The boys are on their best behavior, naturally, although they are so excited they can barely stand it. I did have to threaten to use the special Parent Hotline to Santa yesterday, though.

I finished wrapping all the presents last night. There may not be much, but we chose each gift with care. I may be as excited about tomorrow as they are!

It really is the most wonderful time of the year. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Rapturous Festivus and Joyous Kwanzaa to all!

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