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Posts Tagged ‘Rage’

Dear Blog:

I’ve neglected you and I feel guilty. I apologize profusely, but I can’t promise it won’t happen again.

I could make excuses. I’ve been hosting folks in my house (as usual). I’ve been visiting family out of town. I’ve been working at the station and trying to sleep when I’m not.

But really, there is a bigger reason I have ignored you for five days: I don’t know what topic to tackle.

  • Should I address the fact that I’ve almost run over Trish with my car for three days in a row because she wants to greet me in the driveway?
  • Do I write about the permanent neon restaurant sign I saw on a building that read “Bojangles” on one side of the building, but “Bojangle’s” on the other?
  • Would it be better to vent my spleen about certain in-laws of mine who could not tell the truth if their lives depended on it? A corollary to that is that they aren’t happy unless they are saying something nasty behind our backs. This is why I cherish my friends so much.
  • Would it be best to simply offer a fantastic new recipe for potato leek soup that I found?

So, Blog, it is not that I don’t want to write. I just don’t know what topic to address. Forgive me for my indecision, and I’ll try to come up with something soon.

Love and kisses,

Beth

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I rarely read for fun anymore because I don’t have time. People, Newsweek and Entertainment Weekly are my only sources of reading enjoyment. Sad, I know.

While I was in Barnes & Noble buying a book for research, I decided to buy “Columbine” by Dave Cullen because I had heard so many good things about it. I devoured it in less than 24 hours (kind of a long time for me, actually, but I had two vocal distractions and a “Survivor” finale to watch).

It is an impressively researched and incredibly interesting book. I remember the shootings, but was, like most, misled by erroneous and perpetuated media accounts into believing Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold were outcasts who were being bullied. Instead, Cullen makes clear, they often did the bullying, and they had few close friends by choice. At least that was Eric’s choice. He was a true psychopath, the clinical definition. Dylan was depressed, lonely and incredibly shy.

One of the concepts I teach is crisis communication. The Jefferson County sheriff and his office did almost everything wrong. Repeatedly. But, if nothing else, communicators can learn from their mistakes.

The overall feeling I have after reading the book is sadness — sadness for the victims and their families, of course, but they have long had support in their recovery and grief. I feel the most sadness for Tom and Sue Klebold and Wayne and Kathy Harris. It is easy to point the finger of “bad parenting” at them, but there is no “if/then” manual for parents. You have to do the best you can. It is hard to distinguish the difference between warning signs and normal teenage angst. And no one wants to think his/her child is a psychopath. They also lost their children on April 20, 1999, but their children were killers, which adds another layer of pain. They also lost community support and relationships. They were vilified unjustly.

In general, the book is a solid piece of reporting. I do wonder why he chose to focus on the stories of a few of the victims, but not all. Some are not even mentioned. Also, Cullen could have used a diagram of the building and images of the people he discusses, but perhaps he thought the images would sensationalize the story even more than it has been. But I wanted to be able to visualize whom he was discussing. I turned to the Internet, of course. The bullying myth is still rampant in the comments on the videos. I wanted to respond to all of them. Sigh. Maybe word will get around thanks to Cullen.

Now I’m off to play with the kids, and hope that one of them does not grow up to be infamous.

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While I enjoyed teaching each of my four classes this quarter, the one that affected me the most on a personal basis was Persuasive Writing. In the final persuasive research papers, the graduate students — all  writers of promise — encouraged me to stop watching “Hoarders,” camp in national parks, support art funding in schools, lobby for a three-point harness on airplanes, write my representatives in support of the Alzheimer’s Breakthrough Act of 2009, join the bone marrow registry, and go vegan.

One affected me so much that I’m doing research today. Can you guess which one?

Here’s a hint: Think about my blog.

Yes, I’m considering veganism. Or at least a more cruelty-free lifestyle.

All of the papers were persuasive, but only one made me consider each bite of food, every meal I prepare, and all my grocery-shopping trips. I don’t really object to eating meat in general, but I have always objected to the American meat industry and the horrible way animals “live” and die on factory farms. I don’t eat beef in America, in fact, for this reason.

This morning, I eyed the Thanksgiving turkey in the freezer and felt sad and guilty. I fed Trish and thought of the cellophaned breasts in the refrigerator. I threaded Dominic’s belt through the loops on his pants and thought of milking Rosebud in the second grade.

And now I’m wondering if this Web site is on the up and up.

Thanks, Austin Floyd.

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A rant about rants

I’m a little out of my element with this post, but clearly I’m moved enough to write.

University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert was suspended indefinitely for her unsportsmanlike conduct in a semifinal game against Brigham Young University.

Before Friday morning, I had never heard of this person. Today, I can’t think of anything else. Thanks, ESPN.

What was missing from the coverage Friday morning was the coach’s reaction and the college’s reaction. That response finally came Friday afternoon. As expected, Lambert apologized, and claimed, all Serena Williams-style, that she lost control in a heated moment. The full apology is posted on the college’s Web site, but here is one part:

This is in no way indicative of my character or the soccer player that I am.

Hmmm. This is the player whom the media guide praises for being “fearless when making a challenge.” The player whom head coach Kit Vela calls “fiery” on Lobo TV.

I think they liked her attitude and encouraged it. That’s the sports culture. Win at all costs. Here is a highlight reel of her actions in the BYU game.

UNM Vice President for Athletics Paul Krebs said, “There is no way to defend her actions.” But I’m willing to bet she’ll be back at it again when the spotlight is off and she is back on the field.

And that brings up a larger question of what has she learned. What has anyone learned? This kind of stuff happens all the time. It is our culture of rage where the angry cross some line (finally), apologize (sincerely or not), and then continue with their healthy careers. John McEnroe, Barry Bonds, Rasheed Wallace, Tony Stewart … the list goes on and on.

Inappropriate behavior, apology, more inappropriate behavior. Lather, rinse, repeat. It makes my head hurt.

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