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I’d like my taco to go …

Posted in Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 14, 2025| 5 Comments »

Dear Trump (aka Tacolini):

I was at your birthday “party.” It was an accident, believe me. I booked a flight months ago to go to Washington, D.C., for a conference. It was only a couple of weeks ago that I realized I’d be flying in on the day of your vanity parade.

What a waste of taxpayer money. It’s as bad as your weekly golf trips.

Yet we can’t afford cancer research, SNAP benefits, Medicaid, an HIV vaccine, etc.

Sure. 🙄

Anyway.

I’m staying up near DuPont Circle, which was a ghost town. I assumed it was because everyone was still at a No Kings protest or at your thing.

Maybe the former, but certainly not the latter. Admittedly, I got there near the end. (Yes, I went because I’m nosy).

I expected to see a whole bunch of your acolytes. I saw maybe three obvious ones and a couple I suspect.

Maybe these folks? 🤷🏻‍♀️

It seemed … poorly attended. I thought I must be missing something. I had a look at social media to see.

Oooh. That’s got to sting.

Oh, yes. Look at you:

Sour Puss next to Whiskey Pete, the DUI hire

It couldn’t happen to a worse person. I hope you had a terrible day. Sorry, not sorry.

I have never liked you. That’s never been a secret. You are everything people teach their kids not to be: greedy, petty, vindictive, boastful, willfully ignorant, etc.

And your policies actively hurt most people and help only very rich people.

[For people who say I have Trump Derangement Syndrome, and my life is better because of Trump, you can f—- all the way off. I know my life, and it was made worse by this idiot’s policies the first time (taxes, work experiences), and already this second time (work repercussions).]

I mean, look at you already backing off your immigration stance.

It’s only because you realized it was hurting your wealthy friends who employ undocumented workers.

As I was walking around, I was pleased to see a few things, such as these lightpost signs:

And then, I saw this:

Awww. So much empty.

There was a significant police presence, but not enough humans around to justify.

I heard some sirens and noise, so I followed the sound and found some people leaving the Washington Monument area.

It was a mix of people leaving the parade plus leftover No Kings. Then I went down the block a bit.

Some chanting, that’s it. Peaceful protest.

I was wearing my “Maybe today, Satan” shirt, but I did not get involved. Frankly, in my heart I know not ACAB, but I saw what enforcement folks did to reporters and regulars in L.A. I have a conference to attend, and I can’t do it from the hospital or jail.

Maybe. Maybe not.

So I left, and I ate a lovely dinner at Nando’s. Did NOT raise a glass to you.

I hope you are miserable knowing that millions of people turned out in cities large and small in the U.S. and abroad to protest you and all those who enable you — your junk drawer of a “Cabinet,” the spineless sycophants in Congress, your donors, and anyone who voted for you and still supports you.

I hope you had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

With no regards,
Beth

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Truth is stranger than fiction #ThursdayThoughts

Posted in Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 20, 2025| 6 Comments »

Isn’t FOX News basically a scam targeting seniors? I can see why this administration wouldn’t want seniors to recognize a scam — like voting for a con man.

Hey kids!

Auntie Beth has a fun new game for you. It’s called Truth AND Consequences.

We’ll start with a scenario. You decide if it’s real or if Auntie Beth’s fertile imagination made it up Onion-style. Here’s an example:

Trump administration fires more than 300 staffers at the National Nuclear Security Administration. Rehires them the next day when they realize those people oversee America’s nuclear weapons. But wait: They can’t locate their personal contact info and are asking remaining employees for help.

Is this real or fake news?

If you answered real, you are RIGHT!

Are you ready? Here we go!

USDA accidentally fired officials working on bird flu and is now trying to rehire them.

REAL!

A reality TV star in charge of transportation weighed in on autism research promoted by an anti-vax former (?) heroin addict in charge of health.

REAL!

Trump just delegitimized a vaccine he was proud of getting to the public quickly.

REAL!

A non-elected, non-government person with no oversight has been given broad access to internal, confidential U.S. government databases and is making sweeping decisions on funding programs based on whether he thinks they are valuable or not. Oh, and he makes $7 million per day from the very same government.

FAKE NEWS! Elon Musk makes $8 million per day from all his federal contracts.

VP Vance refused to meet with the Chancellor of Germany, but did meet with the leader of the far-right German party who calls Holocaust remembrance a “guilt cult.”

REAL!

Speaker of the House Mike Johnson and Senate Majority Leader John Thune said that Trump cannot continue to govern through Executive Orders — that they are done being “his bitches,” and he must work with Congress.

Please. Are you kidding? That’s as FAKE as RFK Jr.’s tan. Those two couldn’t find a spine if they were locked overnight in the Brooklyn Bone Museum.

The man above was busted for:

A. Serving minors in his bar.
B. Drinking on the job.
C. Cheating on his taxes.
D. Causing an international PR crisis.

This is a toughie. It’s D for sure, but also likely C and B (though it LOOKS like A if you happen to just glance at the TV*).

Old man who has been accusing everyone of spending too much money spends $5 million for a joyride around a racetrack.

REAL!

Two Republican reps have introduced legislation to increase your bank fees.

REAL!

And one wants to rename Greenland to “Red, White, and Blueland.”

REAL!

A woman reported to be a Chinese spy has been chosen to head national intelligence for America.

FAKE NEWS! Tulsi Gabbard allegedly works for Russia.

The President of the United States of America declared himself king.

REAL!

The Internal Revenue Service is about to lay off 6,000 employees in the middle of tax season.

FAKE NEWS! It’s closer to 6,700.

The image above is of:

A. Mr. Potato Head in human form.
B. A man who claimed that advising people of their rights is a crime.
C. A contributor to Project 2025.

The answer is both B and C, but A also appears to be true.

The wheelchair-bound governor of Texas signed a bill overturning the very policies that are supposed to help disabled people get a fair shake.

REAL!

How many out of the 15 did you get right? (Were you even able to add up your score through your tears and/or blinding rage?)

This is America, y’all. Schoolhouse Rock didn’t prepare us for this bullshit.

The United States has three branches of government. At the moment, only the executive branch and judicial branch seem to be active. The Republicans in Congress seem to be OK with Trump governing via Executive Order.

Auntie Beth says if you don’t like it, call your Senators and Representatives. Auntie Beth knows that a woman’s place is in the resistance.

*According to my friend John.

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Runnin’ with the Devil* #ThursdayThoughts

Posted in Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 23, 2025| 5 Comments »

Dear Satan,

Well, you’ve outdone yourself: Getting “Christians” to criticize someone espousing the teachings of the Bible AND to accept two Nazi salutes in one day?

Impressive.

I would have said Hell would have frozen over before I saw these two things.

It did snow in Florida, so I guess that’s close enough.

Here’s Dominic in the snow in Pensacola, Florida. Florida = Hell for me as long as DeSantis is in charge.

Trump sold his soul to you, didn’t he? That is really the only way to explain his rise to power and the loyalty to and love for him.

Trump fans: “Back the blue! We are the party of law and order!”
Trump pardons people who killed and injured police officers.
Trump fans: “I didn’t see it.” “Are we making a big deal about the pardons that Biden put in place? That’d be worse.”

Trump fans: “Gas is too expensive. I can’t afford eggs! Trump is going to help the regular folks.”
Trump nominates billionaires to cabinet positions and invites others to his inauguration while — quite literally — leaving regular folks out in the cold.
Trump fans: “Sounds great! They will put America first.”

Trump fans: “Trump knows what he is doing. Musk is intelligent. He’s innovative.”
Musk gives what appears to be the Nazi salute not once, but twice.
Trump fans: “Oh, he’s autistic.” “It was just awkward.” But also from the actual Nazis: “We are so back.”

Musk is really smart but not smart enough not to do what looks just like a Nazi salute? And I know many autistic people who don’t run around doing that gesture. Make it make sense. Satan, is this your idea of Hell on Earth for me outside of Florida?

Succeed in what, Leon? SUCCEED IN WHAT?

There’s an excuse for every damn thing. No one ever says, “Yep. That was wrong. I don’t agree with it.” It’s always, “But Biden did this thing … “ or “I work for Trump.” No, you work for the American people.

Trump signed 42 executive orders and 115 personnel actions on the first day (many of which sound a whole heck of a lot like Project 2025 — not that Trump had any knowledge of that at all, of course).

Among them are these winners:

  • Requiring all federal workers to return to in-person work, as well as a directive to address the cost-of-living crisis. I’m sure that order is going over well with workers. And I’m no genius like Musk, but I’m thinking that the cost of living is much lower in rural areas instead of cities where federal workers might have to be in the office. If they could work from home from these areas, it might kill two birds with one stone. But what do I know?
  • Ending birthright citizenship protected by the 14th Amendment. Nice try, but Trump can’t change the U.S. Constitution with an Executive Order. Both chambers of Congress would have to pass the amendment with a two-thirds majority, plus at least 38 states would have to approve. Not so easy peasy. Fun fact: People have said that four of his five kids won’t be citizens anymore, but that isn’t true: One parent had to be a U.S. citizen at the time of the child’s birth. But guess who WOULDN’T be considered a citizen anymore? Kamala Harris (probably why petty Mr. Trump is so keen on getting rid of the protection). You know who else? Vivek Ramaswamy. Oh, and new Secretary of State Marco Rubio. C’est la vie!
  • Withdrawing from the Paris Agreement. Why? Because it doesn’t hold everyone accountable like it should? Ooookkkayyy. The reality is that climate change is fast making this planet unbearable. I’m not understanding how people can say that humans can control the weather and are responsible for the L.A. wildfires but NOT for climate change in general.
  • Withdrawing from the World Health Organization. Why? Because they hurt Trump’s fee fees during the COVID pandemic for how he handled it? If the United States is out, it’s likely China will step up. That would give them more worldwide influence. Is that a good idea?
  • Renaming Gulf of Mexico and Denali to Gulf of America and Mount McKinley respectively. Regarding the first, GTFO. ARE YOU SERIOUS? I mean, fine. I guess Trump can make the United States do what he wants, but he can’t make the world call it that. Regarding the second, there is some ridiculousness at play here. Just look at this from the White House website:
Denali already is named to honor our nation’s history — Native American history as it comes from Alaska’s Koyukon Athabascan people, translating roughly to “The Great One.” A prospector named Dickey started calling it Mount McKinley in 1897; the federal government officially named it McKinley in 1917. Alaska reps started trying to get the name changed back to Denali beginning in 1975 and finally succeeded in 2015, over the protests of the reps in McKinley’s home state of Ohio. OHIO. By the way, McKinley never even set foot in Alaska. So which history is Trump honoring? A president who only served for four years (1897-1901) or, you know, an entire people and country that existed before white folks showed up? That’s a rhetorical question. I know whom Trump likes.

I genuinely think Trump does and says crazy things every day so that he keeps the focus and also so that no one has time to really give any of these things full attention. Nothing gets even one full news cycle. Not that the national news is doing any kind of real news reporting. (And I say that as someone who was an actual news reporter.)

Anyway, back to the beginning.

“But mah eggs!”

Listen, kitten, eggs are not going to get cheaper. First, there’s the H5 bird flu — now found in a Georgia commerical poultry plant (fun!).

Second, Trump has rich friends he wants to please (see above).

A 50-page plan from the House Ways and Means Committee outlines exciting ways to give tax breaks to wealthy people and corporations and all the things they can cut to pay for it:

Handouts include removing the estate tax for millionaires, lowering the corporate tax rate to 15 percent, and repealing the corporate profit minimum tax of 15 percent. Cost? $1.2 trillion.

Ways to pay for it? Well, they aren’t going to turn around and tax those same people. Guess who pays? I’ll take “working families” for $100, Alex.**

How? By removing the mortgage interest deduction, raising taxes on single parents, raising taxes on college students, eliminating the tax credit for child care. Oh right, and the tariff on imports, which will be passed along to consumers because THAT IS HOW TARIFFS WORK.

Satan, you have really done a number here. You convinced so many people to vote against their own best interests. Congratulations! Really, good job! During the election, there was one candidate promising $25K toward a down payment for a house. Now the one who won — your buddy! — is taking away a tax credit for people who somehow manage to actually own a house. Delightful!

Really spectacular work. You’ve gone above and beyond.

I’m SO EXCITED to be living in this timeline, Satan. Thanks so much for your machinations.

(Maybe I should have added a trigger warning for extreme sarcasm.)

Sigh.

At least this train wreck can’t go on indefinitely. For you to get a soul, the person has to … expire. No one lives forever.

Not that I’m wishing death on anyone or anything. Of course not.

Maybe good ultimately will win.

Maybe some people in power will discover they have spines.

Maybe you’ll get distracted by a Georgia kid named Johnny or something.

Who knows?!

One can only hope.

Anyway, congrats! You’re winning. #tigerblood
Beth

*It’s only Van Halen if David Lee Roth is singing. Otherwise, it’s Van Hagar.

**Don’t believe me? Read the pdf.

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Stupid is as stupid does #TuesdayTantrums

Posted in Education, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 3, 2024| 9 Comments »

Dear People Who Like To Be “In The Know,”

With all the drama surrounding the Biden pardon*, you may have missed the other big drama unfolding on the platform formerly known as Twitter:

A woman defended her dissertation and posted about it. Normal people would say “Congrats!” and go on with their lives.

But on Leon’s platform, no one behaves normally.

People lost their ever-lovin’ minds.

Categories of outrage:

  1. She should be having kids, not studying anything.
  2. ⁠Her topic is stupid.
  3. It’s stupid and WOKE.
  4. ⁠Taxpayer money (! – from the stupid Americans, of course) spent on stupid topic. (Note: She’s in the UK.)
  5. ⁠She’s seeking validation and is therefore stupid.
  6. Her topic is stupid, and therefore I’m smarter (the “I” here being the outraged respondent).
  7. A degree is a waste.

You don’t believe me? Here is a quick sample:

(Note that all these accounts have Leon’s blue check, indicating they pay for the “privilege.” 🙄)

The one that takes the cake is the one she references here:

I mean: WHAT THE ACTUAL F—-?!

One of the main through lines here is that people do not understand that dissertations are always relatively niche. They cap a broader area of study.

It’s not just that they don’t understand. They also are completely unwilling to learn.

The anti-intellectualism, anti-science, anti-knowledge, sheer-contempt-for-education bent that many people seem to have is on full display.

I waded in when I saw this:

Um … WHAT?!

What benefit does anyone intend to bring to the world with our education and, ultimately, our job?

Well, Marilyn, who claims she worked successfully as a technical writer at a Fortune 300 company without needing more than a high-school degree, thinks that Dr. Louks can’t write, isn’t a deep thinker, wasted her time on an advanced degree, and won’t get a job.

Note that Dr. Louks already is teaching at Cambridge, but why let a fact stand in the way of Marilyn’s superior opinion?

Before I go on, let me remind you that our Marilyn was a technical writer (so she says). And she is criticizing Dr. Louks’ writing ability. DEAR GOD. My copyediting brain is going to explode.

I tried to share information with her. I can’t help it.

I tried because I would consider myself knowledgeable about the subject at hand:

1. I wrote a dissertation and earned a Ph.D.
2. I work in higher education.
3. I hire newly minted academic doctors all the time.

My brothers and sisters in Christ, I’m sure you can imagine that it did not stop there. There was a fair amount of back and forth where I explained that some jobs do indeed require an advanced degree, that I have one (an advanced degree AND a job) in higher education, and that Dr. Louks will be OK.

Here we are nearing the end where I finally gave up.

<RECORD SCRATCH>

I DON’T? I literally spend half my waking hours working in the education system.

So I said it’s my field, not hers. That she’s doubling down on being ignorant, and I was done trying to help her understand.

You can’t fix stupid.

She’s still on there making these insane claims. She’s learned nothing.

Meanwhile, I’ve learned that I really do need to stay on Bluesky where it’s civil. It’s like the early days of Twitter. No “premium” subscription needed.

Please check it out before the trolls take over. Or Leon buys it and ruins it like everything else he touches.

See you there!
Beth

*BTW, let’s put that in perspective:

Donald Trump pardons Steve Bannon, Roger Stone, Michael Flynn, etc.
MAGA: THIS IS HIS RIGHT!

Joe Biden pardons Hunter Biden.
MAGA: THIS IS SO WRONG!

(credit to @JoJofromJerz)

“BUT JOE LIED! He said he wouldn’t!” Yeah, well, things change. Trump and his cronies said they were going after Hunter and many others as soon as they get in. Also, Trump lied more than 30K times during his term, so maybe take a seat. Or several.

Finally, Hunter’s punishment didn’t fit his crime. Talk about a witch hunt.

So if you support the felon (convicted, I’ll remind you, by a JURY) and his cabinet of rapists/thugs/sycophants/donors (including daughter’s father-in-law — also a felon whom he pardoned), zip it about the pardon.

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We don’t need no education* #TuesdayTirade

Posted in Education, Technology, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 19, 2024| 9 Comments »

Dear Internet Experts,

Notice that I did not say “experts on the internet.” There is a difference. Just because you have access to all sorts of information, that does not mean you are an expert on various topics.

Case in point: 45 (incoming 47) spends loads of time on his phone, could Google “tariffs” if he wanted, but does not seem to understand how they work. Fact: Other countries do not actually pay the price.

(And those who think tariffs won’t drive up costs ALSO could have done a quick Google search BEFORE the election when it would have been most helpful, not afterward.)

I read a surprising exchange on the platform formerly known as Twitter. A person actually said that having a degree in a subject doesn’t make you an expert.

Um. What?

I’ll allow that maybe it doesn’t make you THE expert, but it does make you AN expert. You certainly would be better versed in the subject than some rando.

I have a graduate certificate in explosives technology. I wouldn’t call myself an expert, but I would say I know more than the average person.

In the runup to the election, I had friends of Facebook friends — people who didn’t know me — trying to tell me about the “woke liberal media,” “fake news” and media ownership.

I wanted to scream, “I worked in media for 30+ years. I literally wrote the book** on media ownership. SHUT UP.”

When did people become so anti-science and anti-knowledge? When did people stop listening to people who have experience and expertise and KNOW WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT?

Can you imagine someone who has never done your job telling you they know more about it than you do? You would be outraged. And rightfully so.

So why, dearest Internet Expert, do you think it is OK to do this on social media?

Look at this exchange about COVID (which, by the way, is still around and killing people, even though we like to ignore it):

So let’s recap: A person with an advanced degree in virology is being told by these “Internet Experts” that she:

  • is giving terrible advice.
  • lives in a fantasy.
  • is a low IQ individual.
  • doesn’t know anything.

Her actual job for more than 10 years is studying viruses, but yet she doesn’t know as much as these three fools?

GTFO.

For kicks, here are their profiles:

So they seem fun.

Honestly, where do people get off?

I saw this just today:

I’m all for people having opinions, but come on: We are not equal in all areas. There is and should be a hierarchy of knowledge.

For example, I will listen to my doctor about my health over WebMD. (It’s better that way anyhow: WebMD always says I’m dying tomorrow.)

My point? Stay in your lane. I’m sure you have an expertise. We will trust you in that area. In return, please trust others who are experts in their fields.

Google is a great tool, but it is no match for a true education.

Thanks for your consideration,
Beth

*Pink Floyd seems appropriate here.

**OK, it was a book-length dissertation, but still.

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Just another MAGA Monday* #MondayMadness

Posted in Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 11, 2024| 8 Comments »

To Trump Voters,

Well, it appears you got what you wanted.

Now we are all in the Finding Out stage of F—-ing Around.

I hope it works out, but I’m afraid it won’t.

I haven’t forgotten his first term,

Though I’m not a fan of Biden’s Department of Education (see FAFSA failure), Trump’s was terrible too (hi, Betsy DeVos).

Now he just wants to just get rid of the DoE altogether.

Without the Department of Education, what becomes of special needs programs? Head Start? Pell Grants? FAFSA overall?

Oh, money is going back to the states? Riiiiight. Sure it is. I’ll bite: How? What’s the process? How is it not going to be a disaster like FAFSA was/is?

Why do I care? I work in higher education. I am worried about my job in a way I’ve never had to worry about in any other presidential election.

Also, Vance called professors “the enemy.” So that’s great. 🙄

If I lose my job, I can’t sleep on the street. SCOTUS said so.

Plus, I’m middle aged. The sidewalk would hurt my back.

Ordinarily, if the candidate I voted for didn’t win, I’d be disappointed, but I’d go about the business of living my life. Just regular grousing.

It’s different now.

Among many other ‘bright’ ideas, Trump said he wants to bring back prayer in schools (which is a violation of the separation of church and state, and unconstitutional as of 1962), eliminate birthright citizenship (which is against the 14th Amendment of the Constitution**), and plans to go through with mass deportations of millions of people (with “no price tag” — isn’t that the OPPOSITE of smaller government you said you wanted?).

Y’all did say you care about the economy and immigration, so let’s start with the latter.

I don’t think you know who picks your food. Who works on your roads. Who builds your houses. And it will deter people in the tech, engineering and medical fields as well.

There will be a price tag, alright. And we will all pay it.

Deporting illegal immigrants will collapse our economy. Also, we are talking about HUMAN BEINGS with full lives and families in this country. What are they going “back” to? What about the people who have no ties to their country of “origin?” What’s wrong with you?

So let’s talk now about the former, supposedly a big issue (even though the Economist says the U.S. economy is the envy of the world).

Someone wrote on Twitter (it will never be X to me):

Hard times create Democrats.
Democrats create good times.
Good times create Republicans.
Republicans create hard times.***

It’s worth noting that EVERY REPUBLICAN PRESIDENT has had a recession. Economies perform better under Democratic presidents.

You don’t believe me? Look it up.

dO yOUr oWn rESeaRch.

I did my own reconnaissance on the price of things, just for an “OMGTHINGSARESOEXPENSIVE!!” baseline. (They aren’t.)

Note that I’m in Oregon, where cost of living is higher for many things. Produce tends to be lower, though. Still, I’ll check back in on these prices once Trump really gets going.

It’s worth noting that this is the lowest gas has been since I moved here.

I meant to take a pic of coffee. That’s something we import the shit out of. And bananas and sugar. I’ll document those on my next grocery run.****

If Trump starts with his insane tariff plans, costs for all those will go up.

I don’t think you understand tariffs. Or economics. Or definitions of economic systems.

Let me help.

Capitalism: Private individuals and companies offer goods and services. They control production and distribution.

Socialism: The community owns goods and services through a centralized government. Individuals can own property.

Communism: Everything is owned by an authoritarian government. No private property.

Marxism: A critique of capitalism that focuses on the exploitation of workers. Marx said the next step is socialism after the workers rebel.

And while we are at it, here are three more:

Fascism: A system of government where a dictator has complete power — squashing criticism and opposition while emphasizing extreme nationalism.

Authoritarianism: A system of government where the power of the state — either one person or a small group not accountable to the people — is more important than individual freedom.

Oligarchy: A form of government in which a few people or a dominant class holds all the power.

Huh. Those three sound a little too familiar.

Anyway. I did what I could before the election to counter the misinformation you all were lapping up like my naked cat drinks water. I tried. And I voted. Even though my ballot has STILL not been counted, according to the online tracker. (Starlink, again?)

All I can say is this:

I hope you get what you voted for.

Beth

Just putting this here for proof. Ignore the apostrophe (“High’s”). The rest is accurate. (I didn’t make this graphic.)

*Sorry, Bangles.

**Not that it matters because the majority of SCOTUS carries water for the Orange One. And it’s not like he cares about what’s legal anyway.

***A change to this quote.

One final thing: I DARE someone to say, “Your body, my choice” to me. It will be hard for him to speak again with his balls in his throat. #fact

Try me.

And I love this guy.

****UPDATE: Photos from my last grocery run

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We are Family* #ThursdayThoughts

Posted in Parenting, Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 31, 2024| 5 Comments »

Dear Eddie,

Thanks for coming to Family Weekend to surprise Gideon. He loved having you here and being able to talk to you about his classes.

I love that we can still spend time together like regular people/parents even though we are divorced. It’s good for us and for our kids.

Gideon and Mikayla even ditched a Halloween party with their friends to hang out with us and play cards.

(And no, you are not the reigning Uno champ in anyone’s record book. Ask Uncle Pat.)

I was glad you were here this weekend for another reason: I got to see your reaction in person to this:

“Comedy” at its finest, amirite?!

(To all people defending him and the rally in general: Explain the joke. Tell me like I’m five how it’s funny and not offensive. And if it’s that he’s a “shock comic” that took aim at everyone, tell me why there weren’t any jokes about white people. Seriously.)

I could almost see the blood boiling beneath your skin.

One thing Trump didn’t do at the rally, surprisingly, was repeat his stupid claim that children go to school for gender reassignment surgery.

Trump’s team saved the lie for a text blast AFTER the rally. Great. Also, HOW did I get on their list?

Me: Can you imagine? The school wouldn’t even give Gideon a Tylenol for a headache without a note from me!
You: But yet they have surgery suites with doctors and nurses in one of the classrooms. Sure.
Me: And all within a school day! When teachers are buying supplies out of their own pockets. Right.
You: How can anyone believe this?

It was just like old times.

The good news is that Gideon is just like us.

After I texted him what I said to a high-school “friend” who called the MSG rally “patriotic” (the same rally that one of the speakers — radio host Sid Rosenberg — called “a Nazi rally“), he texted the following. (We all curse like sailors so I sanitized it for publication.)

Thought I’m a fan of his POV, I’d love some punctuation.

By the way, did I tell you that he sent in his request for an absentee ballot back in September and Georgia (specifically Chatham County) STILL hasn’t sent it? Same for Mikayla. He’s been calling to no avail. It’s maddening. And Georgia is a swing state too. SIGH.

Anyway, thanks again for coming. It was good to see you.
Beth

*Now you’ll be singing this all day.

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(No) Poker Face* #WednesdayWomen

Posted in Politics, Random, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2024| 6 Comments »

Ladies, do you suffer from FAFO Face like VP Harris?

I know I do.

If you try to stop your face from moving, your thoughts come out through your eyes.

Trust me. I nearly killed a coworker last week, Homelander style.

In its mildest form, it manifests as RBF.

So what can we do?

Not a damn thing. Folks need to get over it. (Or stop doing stupid stuff to cause the face. 😄)

Here’s a handy decoder:

“Oh you think so, do you? FAFO.”
“Let me get this straight.”
“Bitch, please.”
“I’m laughing at you, not with you.”
“Come on, now.”
“This MFer.”
“Do tell.”
“I’m just going to look down at my notes, because my face has nothing nice to say.”
“Oh, honey. I actually feel sorry for you.”

Now let’s test your knowledge. What is my face saying to you?

A. This bar is great.
B. The decor is unique.
C. I found love in a hopeless place.
D. I want to murder this man who sat four inches from me despite the fact that there were 10 empty seats at the bar.

If you said D, then winner, winner, chicken dinner!

Whatever you do, don’t be this guy:

It’s misogynistic and akin to “you should smile more.” Frank, how ’bout you train yourself to STFU.

If you need it, here’s a dude saying roughly the same thing:

It’s an extra layer of communication. Useful, I’d say.

I mean, just think about how moms operate. All you needed was THE LOOK from your mom, and you stopped your buffoonery immediately.

In retrospect, I should amend my first line. I do not “suffer” from FAFO Face. I actually celebrate it! I have the ability to communicate effectively without words.

But here are three:

Bite me, Frank. 😉

*Lady Gaga gives good face. That arched eyebrow!

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I diD mY oWn rEseArcH! #TuesdayTip

Posted in Advice, Politics, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 20, 2024| 4 Comments »

Dear People Who Like to Share Wrong Information:

In the age of social media, I know it is hard not to share a chart or a meme that fits in with your world view/personal bias. I know it seems great in the moment, but I really encourage you to check your facts.

As we are in an election year, and people are foaming at the mouth, sharing misinformation is a real problem.

A couple of far-right friends shared a chart I found interesting:

It’s interesting to me because it looks great for your cause if you are a Trump supporter.

(Quick personal bias check: I am a Never Trumper. I’m sure most of y’all know that.)

BUT THIS CHART IS WRONG. I know it is wrong because I had recently done some research on gas prices.

(That people think the President of the United States controls the price of gas is insane to me.)

Anyway, I was motivated to get the real numbers, and I had some spare time.

I put together a spreadsheet. I hate Excel, so I need everyone to understand that this is a big deal.

In addition to providing the real data for the categories in the chart above, I added some other key info such as the global inflation rate, deficit and GDP. I also added the numbers for the last four years Obama was in office to give context.

I’m presenting it here without comment. These are real numbers, and I can provide sources for this data (non-media sources). Let me know if you want me to send you the spreadsheet with source links.

The bottom line: Educate yourself. Decide what is important to you. Vote accordingly.

Also, don’t share stupid inflammatory shit that is wrong. There is enough misinformation in the world without you adding to it.

Kthxbyeeee,
Beth

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#SundaySoundtrack (what’s not on it)

Posted in Music, tagged , , , , , , , on March 7, 2021| 8 Comments »

Dear Bruce “The Boss” Springsteen,

One of your songs came on the radio, and I immediately changed the channel.

I mean no disrespect. I’m just not a fan.

I know, I know: I’m an American, so I’m supposed to love you and your music.

I don’t. I can live without hearing one of your songs ever again.

There is a whole list of singers/bands who fall into that category for me:

Bruce Hornsby and The Range
Bob Seger and The Silver Bullet Band
The Grateful Dead
Chicago
Joe Cocker
Don Henley
The Cars
George Thorogood
Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers
Steely Dan
The Eagles
The Doobie Brothers

It’s a theme I’ll call “Americana.”

But Cheap Trick? Boston? Blue Öyster Cult? Hell yes.

Look. Listen. I can’t explain my taste.

I can live without “folksy” folks too:

4 Non Blondes
Indigo Girls
Bob Dylan

Good LORD: I cannot STAND Bob Dylan.

I’m sorry. I feel guilty. I feel like I have to turn in my “American” card (which, by the way, I have been tempted to do by things other than music).

Keep on rocking, just not within my earshot.
Beth

 

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