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Archive for the ‘Travel’ Category

Dear Thrifty Car Rental:

Do not rent out electric vehicles. Seriously.

I’m a fan of them, in general, but they are not suited for the rental market for two main reasons:

  1. Miles possible on a charge.
  2. Availability of charging stations.
  3. Time to charge.

Ok, so let’s discuss No. 1. I was told at the JFK rental counter that the Chevy Volt that was forced on me** would get 250 miles per charge.

Perhaps that’s true if the owner takes care of the car. But this Volt was a rental. I was told it was fully charged when the rental fellow turned over the keys.

It didn’t look charged to me:

It looks like it has just over half a charge, but what do I know?

So I went on my way to visit my father on Long Island.

That brings us to No. 2. Random charging stations are available here and there, but there are only a few plugs at a time. With more and more people driving electric vehicles, sometimes there is a wait to charge. There’s also the No. 3 issue. I’ll get to that in a moment.

I found a charging station six miles from my father’s house. It was in a parking lot near a fire station. Luckily, he was able to go with me to set the car on charge, then we drove around and had lunch.

What if that hadn’t been an option?

And here’s the biggest problem: Time to charge (No. 3).

We left the car charging for 2.5 hours. And that wasn’t enough to get it fully charged from a 65-mile drive.

2.5 HOURS!

I had to find another charging station on the way back. (Why? To avoid the $60 fee for bringing it back on less than 100 percent charged. Seems like you REALLY like that dollar figure.)

This time, I managed to find a fast-charge place by a mall. There were five charging units, but only three were working. I had to wait to get one.

I plugged in the car, and waited. Tethered like a teenager to TikTok.

The charging unit said one hour to 80 percent charge. The Volt said 34 minutes to full charge.

Can you guess the Volt’s problem?

My guess is battery health.

It’s not like these cars are cheaper or cooler to drive. And you still have to pay for charging, so there’s no major saving over gas.

Home use is a great idea. I borrowed my friend Marlane’s Kia EV over Thanksgiving, and it was fantastic. I set it on charge in the garage overnight once it got low.

But for a rental? No thanks. Bad idea.

If you won’t take my advice, please just make a note in my file that I never want to rent one again.

Thanks,
Beth

*A classic.

**I got the manager’s special rate with the best available car. The Volt is what was offered. I asked (read: begged) for a regular car. No, ma’am, unless I wanted to pay $60 extra.

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Hi Everyone!

I just got back from a trip to China for work. I was in Zhengzhou and Shanghai. I had been to Shanghai before, so I kind of knew what to expect.

However, there were some surprises.

Things I did not have on my bingo card:

Sweet and sour popcorn fish
What amounted to drinkable kerosene (106 proof!)
A Rolls Royce golf cart for a tour of a university campus
A campus that looked like Disney World mated with Las Vegas
A bowling alley inside the student center
A military parade featuring all 8,000 freshmen
A welcome ceremony that rivaled the opening ceremony for the Olympics
Liberace’s furniture in my hotel room
A bathroom with a viewing window
Duck (I think) to go at the airport
The amount of full-on staring people did at our group
The taxi ride from hell: snorting/coughing and texting driver who wouldn’t turn the air on but wouldn’t turn off the turn signal

It was an interesting and productive trip, but I’m glad to be home.

Beth

*Bowie, of course.

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Dear Oregon,

I’m into you. You seem to have all the things I’m looking for in a state:

  • Mountains
  • A coast
  • Many rivers and lakes
  • Cool cities
  • Local wine and beer
  • Robust agriculture (berries, grapes, hazelnuts, etc.)
  • Interesting people
  • Next Door filled with drama

After a week of 11-hour days, I managed to make time to explore. Three of my coworkers and I headed to Lincoln City on the coast.

Unlike Southern beaches, your beaches are cold and craggy. Beautiful in their own way.

More “Game of Thrones” than “Too Hot to Handle.”

I’m a fan.

After the beach walk, I had the best fish and chips of my life.

Sorry, England: We win. Again.

Looking forward to exploring all your nooks and crannies.

Love,
Beth, STL/ATL/SAV Transplant

*Here’s a whole song by Sleater-Kinney about the state.

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Hello, and Happy Sunday!

I woke up THRILLED today because I had a great night:

I got to see hundreds of naked men. And women.

But that wasn’t why it was a good night. 😉

It was a good night because I made new friends.

It’s always hard to move to a new city and start fresh.

I got to a point where I was mostly done unpacking and started talking to the cat more than seemed normal.

Did you know Facebook dating has a friendship option?

I didn’t until two glasses of wine into Tuesday night when I was missing my STL Tuesday Game Night friends.

I matched with Jackie. We texted. Had a phone call (this is big for me as I hate to talk on the phone). Didn’t get a serial killer vibe.

She invited me out with two of her friends for the World Naked Bike Ride — supporters not participants.

I learned about this event last year.

Yes, please.

Jackie, Melissa, Jen and I stopped by a grocery store in Portland. While waiting for Jen, an elderly woman rushed up to us:

Ladies, did you know a woman reaches a certain age where she can have as many cats as she wants? It’s called “manypaws.”

Lord have MERCY.

She told another dad joke, then walked off.

Me: Do you know her?

Melissa: No, but that’s Portland for you.

We had dinner. Told stories from our lives. Laughed. Then cheered on people braver than I am.

Melissa is planning a Mrs. Roper bar crawl.

Y’all, I’ve found my people.

Next weekend might feature a hike at a monk hangout with a wine tasting involved. I’ll be sure to report back.

Your friend,
Beth

*Dionne, of course.

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Captain’s Log, Day 6 (413 miles logged)

We left the RV parking lot early.

Oregon did not start off impressive.

Dry

Things started looking up, scenery-wise, once we started driving along the Columbia River.

Once again, Leo could not be bothered.

That mouth
Just LOOK at him!

Everyone perked up when the landscape started looking like what you would expect from the Pacific Northwest.

Mt. Hood welcomed us.
Sasquatch hasn’t … yet.

We drove up to my new digs and got the key.

It’s got some things going for it (a big front porch, good size overall) but some things against (no central air, bathrooms are on the first floor while bedrooms are on the second).

And this kitchen — while fine — is nowhere near as great as my St. Louis kitchen.
My St. Louis kitchen. See what I mean?

In fact, I missed my kitchen so much that I CRIED when my utensil organizer wouldn’t fit in the drawer.

It wasn’t about the drawer, though.

It was THE MOMENT that it all became real. I live here now.

I’m so glad I had the family to distract me.

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Captain’s Log, Day 5 (471 miles logged)

It was cold in Yellowstone last night. I was thrilled about that. We slept in and got a late start.

Our first stop was Old Faithful. We did not time it well. According to the online predictor, it wasn’t scheduled to erupt for another 90 or so minutes after we arrived. (I wish I had discovered the predictor before we headed out.)

So this is what we saw.
We made the best of it.**
Eddie most of all.

Our next stop was the Grand Prismatic Spring. We decided to do the overlook hike.

Totally worth it.

The rest of the drive to the West Entrance of Yellowstone was lovely.

Once again, Leo could not be fussed.

This cat. Lord.

He also completely slept through the bit of engine drama. We had gotten gas (again) and were back on the road. Suddenly, the cruise control failed, and I got an error message that said, “Service Advance Trak.” The ABS light also came on.

We pulled over, and I called Cruise America. Despite the rep insisting we had been buffeted by wind (we hadn’t) or driven with a wheel on gravel (nope) or made a sudden swerve (wrong again), he told us how to reset everything.

The instructions are below. And I’m not exaggerating.

  • Turn the ignition off and on again five times, waiting four seconds in each position.
  • Drive 40 mph for 2-3 minutes.
  • Turn off the ignition and back on again.

People, believe me when I say that NO ONE was more shocked than I was when it worked.

It felt like Monica’s guide to erogenous zones.

Anyway, crisis averted, we continued through Idaho.

We passed the Idaho Potato Museum, but we were running behind. I didn’t want to set up camp in the dark again. Also, no one else wanted to go.

Eddie: I have no interest in a potato museum.

Idaho makes Wyoming look like New York City. There’s nothing but potato fields, irrigation systems and dust.

And cancer-causing windmills. (🙄)

Idaho and West Oregon also are bereft of RV parks. We finally found one in Ontario, Oregon, that was basically just a hot-assed parking lot.

It probably would have been better to set up in the dark. It was 93 degrees at 9 p.m.

Gideon and I made the trek across the highway to the gas station to get water.

In Oregon, you have to pay extra for bottled water. So that’s fun. 🙄

(In theory, I’m in favor. In the reality of traveling in an RV with limited space to save bottles, I’m not.)

You also have to pay extra for delightful merch like this. 😉

It was our last night in the RV, so we celebrated.

We’re fancy.

The kids and I played poker, then called it a night. We had to get up early for the last push to my new home.

Tomorrow: The eagle has landed.

*One of my favorite songs by The Cure.

**Please admire my new shirt.

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Captain’s Log, Day 5 (80 miles logged)

I deliberately scheduled a limited-drive day. I figured we road warriors would need a break.

Merle in repose

The scenery from Cody into Yellowstone is SPECTACULAR. That’s why people make the trek.

Leo, of course, could not be bothered.

What a life.

On this journey, we have seen flora, but not fauna. So when we finally saw bison, we lost our minds.

Like Leo, the bison were completely unconcerned about our existence.

I really expected to see more critters. Maybe the rangers still have them locked up.

See? Dipshits abound.

We set up camp at the Yellowstone Fishing Bridge RV Park. We did laundry. Made lunch. Walked to said Fishing Bridge.

Gee, they aren’t related AT ALL. /s
Um …

Photos do not do this place justice. The word “breathtaking” doesn’t do it justice. Yellowstone is one of those places you really have to see for yourself.

But beware of sticky tar-like substances that resist removal efforts.
And birds practicing target practice.

I tried to upload my blog post, but service was spotty. Huge national park. Nature. Go figure. 😉

Dominic, a typical teenager, was bothered by the lack of connectivity.

“What am I supposed to do? ENJOY NATURE?”

All kidding aside, it is beautiful, and we did need to disconnect.

At night, we played card games. All was well.

Next: Old Faithful.

*I’ve always been a fan.

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Captain’s Log, Day 4 (375 miles logged)

This is Merle the RV at home in the Rushmore View RV Park. Merle seems like he’s old, fat and sleeps naked. You’d never know that Merle came in under cover of night and rain.
Merle is basically parked in the lot for this place. Do NOT use a black light in any room.

We decided to eat breakfast in the thriving metropolis of Keystone.

Along the way, we saw more interesting chainsaw sculptures.

But we were there to see two much bigger sculptures.

Mount Rushmore
Crazy Horse

I did enjoy seeing both these monuments. However, my experience was marred by a few things:

  • The oppressive heat. Surely I must have lost 10 pounds in water weight from sweating.
  • People. The older I get, the less I like crowds. And as these are tourist attractions, there are many people there. I think one person out of five operates on one brain cell. So you get hundreds of people together, and you are bound to have a pack of idiots.
  • Flies. The house fly must be the South Dakota State Insect.
  • The admission price. It cost $35 to get into the Crazy Horse Monument. That would be a good price if I liked museums or movies about history. I don’t. The family doesn’t. I think we should have saved money and just driven by. But we didn’t.
This photo cost $35. 😉

We got on the road to Cody just after noon. Wyoming makes South Dakota seem wildly overpopulated.

There aren’t even any billboards!

It’s flat for miles, then suddenly there was a canyon.

Eddie to me, the driver: Slow down, please.

Me: It’s fine. It just feels weird from over there.

Him: The brake isn’t working.

Me (alarmed): What do you mean?

Him: The brake over here (gestures to the passenger floorboard).

We rolled up to the Cody KOA at 6:52 p.m. When I checked in, I found out that there is a free shuttle to the Cody rodeo every night during the summer.

A RODEO!

But the shuttle would be leaving at 7 p.m.

Eddie didn’t want to go, so he said he’d handle setup. The boys and I ran over to the bus.

You KNOW I wasn’t going to miss my chance. I haven’t seen a rodeo since I covered one in Ludowici, Georgia, when I was a TV reporter.

I was DEFINITELY more excited to be there than they were.

The only bad thing is that the clown co-MC’s jokes were SO OLD. For example:

What do OJ and that Bronco running around there have in common?

Neither one wants to go to the pen.

Yeah.

Still. A good time was had by all.

Coming tomorrow: Yellowstone

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Captain’s Log, Day 3 (490 miles logged)

Get ready, people: This place has everything: saloons, Costner merch, a building decorated with corn, taxidermy (yay!), a massive jackalope sculpture, and an out-of-place T-Rex.

The first night in the RV went well. We had pride in a job well done, as we had never hooked up an RV before. It wasn’t hard at all. I was worried for nothing.

The RV is spacious. It should be at 30 feet long.

Everyone has a space of his/her own.

I’m on the converted dining room table. (The photo didn’t turn out.)

Leo, as you see, is everywhere.

He’s a bed-hopping whore. Leo, not Dominic. (I don’t think Dominic is, anyway.)

You may wonder why Eddie and I aren’t sharing.

Well, it’s because we are divorced. I know that may come as a surprise as I’ve never mentioned it publicly. It’s private.

It’s also obviously amicable, as we are on this road trip together (mutual choice). I mean, we were together for nearly 30 years. We are part of each other’s lives. We are coparenting. And we still like each other!

Anyway, we started in Onawa, Iowa, and made our way through South Dakota. So many things to see along the way.

Starting with this fine specimen at a rest stop.
80 mph speed limit!
Corn Palace!
Is it a gym? A theater? No, it’s a gift shop.
Want more info? Here you go.
We also stopped at 1880 Town.
This is the main attraction, apparently.
I don’t really care about the movie or Kevin Costner.

But I DO care about a cool Wild West town.

And that I have a son in jail.
That’s what happens when you raise criminals.
I also care about my new side hustle.

The saloon was a big draw. That’s where the refreshments were. No beer, though, which seems like a missed opportunity.

There also was live music.

“Live”

As soon as Gideon saw the performer, he said, “Yeah, he was born here.”

Unadvertised attraction: unfettered goat action

Our next stop was Wall Drug. There had been 423 billboards advertising it, including one with a command.

We did as we were told.

Narrator: They could have missed it and been fine.

I enjoyed the massive jackalope, but the rest was just shopping.
And bad animatronics.
And taxidermied bison.
And this. Just why?

We decided to eat at the Badlands Saloon and Grille. Sadly, our server, Mateo, had no sense of urgency regarding our food and hydration needs.

The delicious Mac and Cheese Burger nearly made up for Mateo.

Thanks to our extended stay in the restaurant, we arrived later than we wanted to the Rushmore View RV Park. We had to set up camp in the dark in the rain. (View? What view?)

Coming soon: Our gang pays a visit to George and his gang.

*This was on a T-shirt at the Corn Palace. Seriously.

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Captain’s Log, Day 2 (492 miles logged)

Loading the rest of the RV and double-checking that the house was empty SUCKED. That is why I looked like this:

RAGGEDY
I bruise easily, but still.

My mom picked up the boys from the airport, and I met them for breakfast for a last meal with her.

She had a present for Leo, considering he’s going with me to a very granola place.

Leo was NOT amused.

We finally got on the road around 10:30 — just two hours later than I hoped.

I’m glad I didn’t need the boys to stay up and keep Eddie and me company.

Eddie and I did see some interesting road sculptures.

And land of Trish.

But that’s about it.

We arrived at the Sunset at Blue Oasis RV park just before sunset. (Timing FTW!)

We set up shop.

Leo made it very difficult to organize anything.

Eddie and Gideon hit the pool while Dominic pouted. He’s addicted to Rainbow Six Siege (withdrawal is hard) and possibly some girl named Emma.

See Dominic sulk (right).

I made chili for dinner, but realized I had made a crucial error: I didn’t pack bowls. I only had one, so we made do, cowboy style.

Dominic said we needed to be listening to an old-time radio show, so he found a ghost-story podcast.

We planned to watch a movie, but exhaustion set in. It was a REALLY long day: Four states and nearly 500 miles.

Next up: South Dakota and the Corn Palace

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