Are you trying to wrap your head around the Cornell 7 story? Or even surprised at some of the insane (almost always male) reactions to it? So surprised and disgusted that you can’t even formulate a response?
Auntie Beth is here to help.
What to say to the “not all men” crowd and/or rapist apologists:
Asinine comment She knew what she was getting into by going to the frat house. Response (dealer’s choice) • There were a whole bunch of guys there too. Did they also sign up to be raped? • Rapes happen in homes, hotels, dressing rooms, even behind dumpsters. Women can’t go anywhere then. • She went to see a friend. With friends like that, no one needs enemies.
Dipshit remark Come on. She wanted it. Response Do you have a vagina? I do. Let me tell you: No vagina wants seven hours of sex.
Idiot on social media She told police everything was consensual. Response Maybe she did want to do ketamine and have sex with her friend. Maybe she even wanted a threesome. BUT consent stops when consciousness does. She probably was not aware of everything that transpired until she saw the screenshot of the group chat much later. Also, rape is fucking traumatic, you douchebag. Processing it takes time and different forms.
(Frankly, I don’t care if she walked into that house stark naked, high as a kite, and started dancing on a pole. That doesn’t mean she’s suddenly the house fuck toy.)
Helpful reminders here: 1. This is what consent means. 2. If given the choice, would the victim market herself as “free pussy” to the fraternity? 3. 57 dudes saw that message. 4. All those dudes took one of two paths: They either went to get some, or they ignored it. No one took a third path — that of a normal human who finds rape disgusting — and either protected her on his own or called the cops. 5. One sent her screenshots later. Yay? 6. If a dude passed out in a sorority house, he would not find himself in a similar situation. It would be more like this.
Buffoon’s statement It’s two years later. Why didn’t she come forward then? She must be lying. Response She fucking did. She went to campus police. (And if you read the statement, it’s clear she doesn’t remember everything that happened. 10 drinks in three hours plus ketamine plus pot will do that.) Cornell conducted a whole Title IX investigation (albeit starting three months after the incident). They found SOMETHING, or Chi Phi would not have been banned from campus. Ithaca police, fools that they are, relied on info from Cornell police, who withheld the group chat information. That’s one of the reasons they are reopening the case.
What an ass says Calm down. At least the case is being reopened. Response Yeah, because of the outrage. It’s the Safety Valve Theory. But then everything will go back to the way it was, is and always will be. (Fuck the Patriarchy!)
What the rape defender says These young men have a promising future. Their lives shouldn’t be destroyed by this! Innocent until proven guilty. Response If they are smart enough to have a promising future, they are smart enough not to jeopardize it by raping someone. And what about her future? Sure, innocent until proven guilty, but let’s not kid ourselves that the guilty are ever truly punished either.
Rules for women: Don’t go there. Don’t wear that. Don’t go alone. Don’t drink. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t be polite. Don’t be rude. Don’t accept a ride. Don’t stay out late. Don’t go out too early.
And all the evolved men out there, you have a responsibility too. Hold other men accountable. Change the culture. If you aren’t part of the solution, you are part of the problem.
Don’t be one of the seven. Don’t be one of the 50. Don’t even be that one who sent a text LATER.
Be the one who stops it RIGHT THEN.
Better yet: Don’t ever let it start.
You know Auntie Beth talked to her own sons immediately to make sure she had talked to them enough when they were growing up that they would know what to do.
Every woman has been catcalled, groped, harassed, stalked, assaulted, or raped — sometimes all of the above. Ask any woman if you don’t believe Auntie Beth. (Ask Auntie Beth why she knows … )
“Not all men” but always a man. How are we supposed to know which men are safe? Remember: Jane Doe went to the Chi Phi house to see her friend. Who apparently raped her.
Parting thought: Women’s bodies are their own. Men: You want to get off? Rosy is always free.
It was exactly a year ago that you played Smith’s Olde Bar in Atlanta as part of the U.S. leg of your Space Wolf tour — a leg I planned with no prior tour-planning experience.
(Good GOD. WHAT were we thinking? A leap of faith all around.)
One year ago, I badgered all my friends to come hear you play.
I still haven’t gotten a response to my May 2019 plea. I didn’t really expect one, but I DID hope.
Here’s the thing: What I really want are not material things.
Instead, I want experiences.
Like a blogger friend of mine (edyjournal), I’m not so concerned with status symbols. In fact, sometimes they come with more baggage than they are worth.
For example, I drove a BMW convertible for a while. I bought it used for $4K under the Blue Book value because the seller had already ordered a brand-new one for his kid as a replacement (!).
It was in great shape, and I take care of cars. That’s how my current car (a 2008 VW Eos) has managed to last and still look good.
Anyway, I got so sick of comments like this:
A BMW? Insert name of employer at the time must be paying you well!
[Eye roll]
It was a fantastic car, but I didn’t seek another BMW after it was totaled when I was broadsided at an intersection.
I feel myself growing apart from another friend whose job working with the 1 percent has her chasing the same Richie Rich tokens of success to keep up.
Edit: Having brunch and getting my hooves shaved down with a long-time friend.
When I travel nowadays, I tend not to come home with tokens. (I Marie Kondo-ed my life since moving to Atlanta.) I come home with consumables: snacks for the kids, chicken hoops for me (when I can find them), random condiments, etc.
I don’t add to my physical footprint (not even in weight as I’m still maintaining).
So I’m asking again, Lottery God: Please smile upon me. These experiences aren’t free.
Put the penis away #ThursdayThoughts
Posted in Advice, Uncategorized, tagged Academics, Advice, Attitude, Circles of Hell, Comments, Complaints, Court, Creeps, Disorders, Entitled White Dudes, Family, Fear, Gangs, Gender expectations, Gender roles, Government, Hell, Injuries, Isolation, Kids, Liquor, Marijuana, Media, Mistakes Were Made, News, NSFW, Objectification, Parasites, Parenting, Patriarchy, Peeves, Penises, Politicians, Politics, Rage, Rape culture, Safety, Schitt’s Creek reference, Shocking, Sick, Stereotypes, Students, Stupidity, The Po Po, Trump, Villains, White people, Women, Women's rights on October 1, 2026| 5 Comments »
Hey Girls and Evolved Boys!
Are you trying to wrap your head around the Cornell 7 story? Or even surprised at some of the insane (almost always male) reactions to it? So surprised and disgusted that you can’t even formulate a response?
Auntie Beth is here to help.
What to say to the “not all men” crowd and/or rapist apologists:
Asinine comment
She knew what she was getting into by going to the frat house.
Response (dealer’s choice)
• There were a whole bunch of guys there too. Did they also sign up to be raped?
• Rapes happen in homes, hotels, dressing rooms, even behind dumpsters. Women can’t go anywhere then.
• She went to see a friend. With friends like that, no one needs enemies.
Dipshit remark
Come on. She wanted it.
Response
Do you have a vagina? I do. Let me tell you: No vagina wants seven hours of sex.
Idiot on social media
She told police everything was consensual.
Response
Maybe she did want to do ketamine and have sex with her friend. Maybe she even wanted a threesome. BUT consent stops when consciousness does. She probably was not aware of everything that transpired until she saw the screenshot of the group chat much later. Also, rape is fucking traumatic, you douchebag. Processing it takes time and different forms.
(Frankly, I don’t care if she walked into that house stark naked, high as a kite, and started dancing on a pole. That doesn’t mean she’s suddenly the house fuck toy.)
Buffoon’s statement
It’s two years later. Why didn’t she come forward then? She must be lying.
Response
She fucking did. She went to campus police. (And if you read the statement, it’s clear she doesn’t remember everything that happened. 10 drinks in three hours plus ketamine plus pot will do that.) Cornell conducted a whole Title IX investigation (albeit starting three months after the incident). They found SOMETHING, or Chi Phi would not have been banned from campus. Ithaca police, fools that they are, relied on info from Cornell police, who withheld the group chat information. That’s one of the reasons they are reopening the case.
What an ass says
Calm down. At least the case is being reopened.
Response
Yeah, because of the outrage. It’s the Safety Valve Theory. But then everything will go back to the way it was, is and always will be. (Fuck the Patriarchy!)
What the rape defender says
These young men have a promising future. Their lives shouldn’t be destroyed by this! Innocent until proven guilty.
Response
If they are smart enough to have a promising future, they are smart enough not to jeopardize it by raping someone. And what about her future? Sure, innocent until proven guilty, but let’s not kid ourselves that the guilty are ever truly punished either.
What if we only taught men one thing: Don’t rape.
Then women wouldn’t choose the bear.
And all the evolved men out there, you have a responsibility too. Hold other men accountable. Change the culture. If you aren’t part of the solution, you are part of the problem.
Don’t be one of the seven.
Don’t be one of the 50.
Don’t even be that one who sent a text LATER.
Be the one who stops it RIGHT THEN.
Better yet: Don’t ever let it start.
You know Auntie Beth talked to her own sons immediately to make sure she had talked to them enough when they were growing up that they would know what to do.
Every woman has been catcalled, groped, harassed, stalked, assaulted, or raped — sometimes all of the above. Ask any woman if you don’t believe Auntie Beth. (Ask Auntie Beth why she knows … )
“Not all men” but always a man. How are we supposed to know which men are safe? Remember: Jane Doe went to the Chi Phi house to see her friend. Who apparently raped her.
Parting thought:
Women’s bodies are their own. Men: You want to get off? Rosy is always free.
Best wishes and warmest regards,
Auntie Beth
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